Yodelehee yodelehee yodele hee hoooooo~!

[ It's a cozy tableau: Xerxes Break is sprawled sideways on a plush, overstuffed sofa, drinking hot chocolate out of a teacup. Seated beside him is a "woman of a certain age," once beautiful in her day, probably, and even now could be called "handsome." She is primly and respectably dressed, unlike the gaggle of young ladies (and a few men) clustered around the form of one (1) Gilbert Nightray, backed up against a wall, red-faced and cringing. While Break looks entirely at ease in this situation, Gilbert can only be described as scandalized. The sweater he’s wearing with the giant reindeer on it probably doesn’t help. ]

Has anybody ever been to Switzerland? Lovely place, excellent fondue, and the singing!

[ Break yodels some more. He has a high, breathy voice, and difficulty keeping a tune even at the best of times, so this is a particularly vicious form of vocal villainy. His handsome companion giggles into her cup, whilst Gilbert ducks his head and holds his ears. ]

The Swiss also make terribly good clothing for clambering up mountains, of which they seem to have a great many.

[ "Advanced nano-engineering" is what the Mammut retailer had told him, making their technical clothing light, automatically formfitting (one size really does fit all), impervious to the elements, and able to keep the wearer's body comfortably warm, even in the most extreme, frigid temperatures. ]

Anyway, I've got a few of these left over, with which I might be persuaded to part.

[ He produces a small bundle, hardly larger than a deck of cards, and gives it a shake. It puffs out into a snow suit with an attached hood and gloves, clearly a wonder of late 27th century technology. Unfortunately, late 27th century fashion was to emulate 1980's ski wear. ]

With that in mind, I have some information that might be interesting to those of you who haven't yet found suitable accommodation. My esteemed hostess [ a nod to the respectable lady seated beside him ] has been telling me about an enormous castle, half-buried under the snow. In addition to housing a number of works of art, it was also once used as a hotel, apparently. Thus it occurs to me that, with a bit of, ah, sprucing up, it might serve as a place for us Transports to stay, without having to impose on anybody's hospitality.

[ He pauses, frowning. Somewhere off camera, a baritone voice is pleading about something regarding sin and God and exciting underwear. ]

….which is, alas, all too easy to wear out. [ He leans over the back of the sofa calling: ] I think that's quite enough, Mister Cecil~!

(ooc: Break, Gilbert, Kevin, and others have found temporary shelter in a cathouse bordello. Responses will be from some assortment of the above. Actionspam and threadjacking welcome.)

( PRIVATE to LILY )

( PRIVATE to ELLIE & DICK )

[ Her voice, while somewhat tired, is leveled as she speaks. ]

For the time being, the clinic should be stocked with some personal hygienic products anyone might have been wondering about. There's shampoos, soaps, sanitary napkins, and pads and tampons for the ladies. There's also patches for smokers. Anything else you're looking for, like medicine or bandages, you'll have to check with someone at the clinic.

Anyway, I asked the AI the decrypt a couple of drives belonging to the UE. There were various analytical notes specializing in robotics, specifically robotic spacecraft — rovers. For those unfamiliar: a rover is a vehicle used in space explorations. Depending on the design, they can either be partially or completely operated on their own, or they can transport crews.

There's a couple of bad ideas that come to mind knowing this information: one being they may have plans to come up here eventually and if they aren't fully aware how many of us are here, they'll find out.

Research also indicated "interdimensional colonization". We've been well aware for a while they're able to access portals into other worlds.

The drives also contained some notes on Project Chimera and talks of previous genetic projects the UE's researched. I'll forward anyone who wants a copy of these notes to look over.

[ For those who ask and receive: here. ]

Has anyone begun to compile the information we have together to make it more streamlined? I imagine the AI can likely do it if you ask.

[Well, this is certainly a very shaky view of Kevin’s old fashioned dress shoes. And hey, now what seems like a thumb has blocked the camera. ]

…Hm? Oh! Is it working?

[He shakes the tablet, apparently under the impression that kinetic energy might help it function a little better. The sad truth is that it doesn't.]

Ah, I-I hope so. Hm, sir? Madam? My name is Kevin Cecil, and it recently came to my attention that now I can…heal minor afflictions and illnesses of different natures. If I can be of any assistance, do not hesitate to contact me. I’m currently at…Oh dear Lord, is that St Paul’s?!

[ Baaa Baa-aa-aaaaaa Baaaaaaaaaaa! ]

I say, hello, hel-looooo! I have a question for you all--

[ The grime-smeared face of Xerxes Break appears onscreen. His white hair is discolored with dust and stuck together. There's a semicircular wound under his right cheekbone, and the shoulder of his jacket looks chewed. Despite all of this, he seems terribly pleased with himself. ]

Does anyone here have qualifications in animal husbandry?

[ More angry bleating and a yelp! Break turns. Visible in the background is another (also dirty and disheveled) man, desperately fending off a sheep. It’s not going at all according to plan; with a single headbutt he’s out of the camera’s line of sight, followed by a thud and worrisome tinkling noises. ]

Why, Gilbert. I think she likes you! ♥

[ Moving right along... ]

Anyway - yes. I'm looking specifically for people with experience or interest in shepherding, as well as shearing, spinning, knitting, cheese-making--

[ Another CRASH! and a voice yelling, “Break, look out!" ]

--and hand-to-hand combat! Kindly respond to this post, or apply in person to the botanical gar--

[ Break’s face suddenly disappears. The last image visible onscreen is… this. ]

[The image first shows an open book lying on a table. It seems to be open at the very back, though looking at the page on the left would show that it's full of text so it obviously was supposed to continue where the cover now is. Closer observation would show that several pages after that one were apparently ripped out.

It stays on this image for several moments, or at least what the person showing it thinks is long enough for said observations to be made. Finally, the screen does a very quick 180 to show a livid Elliot.]

WHO IS THE CRIMINAL RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?!

Library books are the property of EVERYONE WHO USES THAT LIBRARY! YOU CAN'T JUST TEAR OUT PAGES WHEREVER YOU SEE FIT! IT'S COMMON COURTESY!

ESPECIALLY NOT IN THE FINAL BOOK OF ONE OF THE GREATEST SERIES EVER WRITTEN!!!

[Mahdi is once again in the kitchen, wearing his red apron and looking particularly flour-dusted and frazzled. He seems slightly wobbly - probably hasn't slept.]

Hey everyone! I made a bunch cookies and I'm just about to drop them to the clinic.

[He sweeps the tablet over to look at each plate of cookies as he describes them:]

Lemon shortbread will give you calm, safe feelings.

Chocolate espresso shortbread will make you feel more cheerful and energized - plus there's coffee in it! [tiny cheer:] Yay coffee!

Um, these are semi-magical cookies, I guess you could say. The effects will vary by person but I'd say... hmmm, the effects last a few hours, half a day at most.

If anyone else is feeling bad or weird, this should help. I've made several dozen, so if you're near the clinic please stop by and take some. Also, um, be careful with your soul. It's actually pretty important. If someone tries to talk you into giving it up, don't listen to them. Just sayin'.

[Mahdi turns the tablet back around to record himself, and smiles brightly.]

That's all!

[But the look fades into something more troubled and he seems to be looking at something in the distance. He absently fiddles with a wisp of his hair, pushing it into his mouth briefly as he thinks.] Forgetting something... oh!

Ashraf, I need to talk to you when you have a sec. If you're at the clinic I'll just stop in.

[Someone still doesn't know how privacy filters work.]


[OOC: Mahdi is responding to the shadow demons. His cookies could be a potential way to avoid the feelings of negativity they bring.]

( oz has spent some time practicing, so when the video feed comes on, it's steady and propped up to give a good view of him in the living room of his apartment. he shoots the camera a grin before holding up a helmet that may seem familiar to some people. )

Hello, everyone! You won't believe what I found today. ( a meow can be heard off-screen, and he corrects himself - ) Or more correctly, Li Jun did. Something like this must belong to someone, right?

( he hefts it up closer to the camera so that viewers on the network can get a better view. it's probably clear he basically thinks it's one of the coolest things ever. a real helmet like what a real knight would have!! maybe even what one of his favorite fictional knights would wear while doing something gallant.

it would probably be rude to put it on his head. which is what he does a moment later, cheerfully, because look okay how many chances like this does one get!! the network gets a wave before he takes it off and adds, )

Well, if it someone's, I wouldn't want to keep it from you. So tell me if it's yours, alright?

[Have a very annoyed and awkward looking teen. He's still trying to act as proud as possible, but it's not easy given the circumstances. Seeing as his roommates are being TOTALLY unreasonable.]

Someone here must offer instruction in specialized subjects, right? Specifically, in... [He frowns obstinately for a few seconds.] ...cleaning. This wasn't my idea, all right?!

[And with that lovely ending, he cuts off the feed.]


[ooc: I do have a main chores teacher discussed already, but feel free to make fun of him or offer other life lessons that rich kids miss?]

Uh. Okay.

As far as I can tell, Pete, Mitsuki and Fi aren't here any more. So I hope if any of you lot knew 'em, you made them feel appreciated while they were here.

( Her tone is vitriol and anger, and frustration because she knows she didn't. If there's anyone she can be counted on to let down, it's Fiona Maxwell. And now she's gone. )

And if you didn't know 'em, then you missed out. They were good bloody people. All right?

Are there any other Australians here, or am I just special, again?

( She's angry, maybe unreasonable, she knows it. But seriously, fuck all you guys. And by that she means The Initiative. )

Shit.


( well, that cheeriness interlude was nice while it lasted )