1 [Video]

[hotdate]

[The video feed clicks on to show Heath in his quarters smiling widely at his audience]

Heeeey Exsilumites. Just trying that word out there, I think it works for us. It makes us sound way cooler than 'Transports', don't you think? Transports make us sound like we're, like, smuggled goods or something. Stuffed in some guys suitcase trying to sneak through customs.

[Wait, he had a point to this ramble, didn't he? He clears his throat]

ANYway, I noticed some of you guys have been getting all antsy about the werewolves, so I thought I'd give you some Monster High approved ways of keeping your werewolves happy. Just follow this advice and you shouldn't have to worry about being mauled unless you...you know antagonise them, and if you do that you're pretty much asking to be chewed on.

[He'll hold up a variety of toys to the camera. Squeaky chickens, tennis balls, even a Frisbee]

Now what all werewolves love is to play fetch. They'll chase pretty much anything. If you throw one of these things in the opposite direction you want to go, you can make sure the thing they're chasing isn't you. If you can't get any toys, sticks work too. ...Though I guess you can't get any sticks on the moon, unless there are like moon trees.

Are there moon trees?

[Back to the subject at hand, moon trees aren't important right now]

They also love steaks, so if you guys are heading out collecting stuff to bring back here, you should probably bring steaks. Not stakes. Because that's for a completely different monster and no one wants to encourage that kind of prejudice anyway.

So there you go! Remember that werewolves are just big adorable puppies in their fuzzy hearts and don't annoy them while they're suffering on the moon and everything will be A-OK. This has been a PSA by the Heathster. You've been a great audience!

Comments

text.

[boughtabookstore]

There are not moon trees.

You have experience with werewolves?

[hotdate]

Awww man, that's a burn.

I do! One of my best friends is a werewolf.

text;

[crocodilesmiles]

Monster High?

[hotdate]

That's the school I attend. [Deliberately slowly] It's for monsters.

video;

[pabulously]

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. I wanna play fetch with a werewolf!!!!!

[hotdate]

There's a whole pack of them here, man. You should totally give it a try.

[And that's how Bolin died]

[Videos]

[bloodthirsts]

I'm thinking your werewolves aren't like the one's in other universes.

[She looks rather amused at the idea of werewolves as 'big adorable puppies'.

And Monster High, really?]

[hotdate]

Probably not, but it can't hurt to give it a try, right?

[Monster High is the coolest high school name and not at all foolish or marketed gosh]

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[hyanaimne]

[Tempest just . . . sighs. Children]

I think the only thing you may be correct about are the steaks.

[hotdate]

The hours of playing fetch with my bro says otherwise, Beautiful.

[Video]

[small_berserker]

I think Exsiliumites sounds better than Transports, too.

[hotdate]

[He'll flash her a smile]

So not only are you smokin' ht, but you've got good taste too.

Video

[showmeyourwreath]

Not to say that we should treat them horribly, but I think these werewolves might be different from the ones you're used to.

[hotdate]

They might be, but it's better than having people afraid of them, right?

Video

[notpeterparker]

[Carol hasn't really tackled the issue of werewolves, even though she's heard a lot of news about them. The whole thing makes her nervous that there could be wolf monsters running around out there eating people, but Heath actually makes her feel more relaxed.]

S-so they aren't hurting anyone then? Everyone was panicked for no reason?

[hotdate]

[And lo, he is successful in his post]

Exactly! People do that, they can't help it. They get scared of what they don't understand, even when they're not in any danger.

video;

[spellwork]

[ hold on. hold on, she's laughing. she's laughing so much. ]

Oh, you do love simplicity, don't you?

[hotdate]

[Being mocked senses....tingling]

I...guess?

video;

[collectedloot]

But... isn't it true that we were sort of smuggled here?

[hotdate]

I...well, yeah. I guess so.

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[snowghoul]

[Oh, Heath. Talking way too much as usual.]

Heath. Where you find those toys?

[hotdate]

[It's a talent]

I...guess I could find stuff here to make toys with? Like maybe melt some of these gross freeze dried not-food things together.

Video

[trickmyheart]

If you are familiar with werewolves, are you also familiar with vampires?

[hotdate]

Sure am! We've got vampires at my school, too.

[text]

[anotheryosuke]

[Why, Heath, why.]

.......dude wiorst advice ever
youre goin to get somebody bit at some point i swear


maybe you should ask the people looking for moon bunnies if theyve fond any moon trees who even knows anymore
also i dunno exsiliumites makes us sound kinda like termites..

[text]

[hotdate]

Stop being paranoid, seesh.

Would the moon bunnies eat the moon tress? 'Cause I thought bunnies ate carrots.

Heck no it's a great name.

Oh hey, also it's great to see you're not dead. Wasn't someone asking to get you medical attention a couple of days ago.