set message parameters: {all} | post-mission return

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Altered states of mind to body relations have been noted and observed. ETA for resolution to current challenge is 120 hours.

Advising that all unwarranted early terminations of members of Administrative Group Initiative will be met with end user tracking and community service hours. For reference, see records on the Baskerville encounter, 01.03.3313.

Comments

text;

[ex_velveteened856]

THAT IS FIVE DAYS

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Five days is an accurate conversion. 432,000 seconds is equally accurate.

[onemoredeath]

How helpful of you.

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

I'm pleased to be of service in reporting accurately and promptly on changes in noted circumstances of importance.

[Voice]

[tootallwithtoomuchhair]

One-hundred-twenty hours? And it never once occurred to your people that something could go wrong just as it has before?

text forever

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

I sense some hostility over perceptions of past ineptitude. Would you like to file a complaint with the administrative group Initiative?

[fatestaywright]

Please don't come back in 120 hours and tell us the solution is going to be to send us on another mission like you did last time.

Please.

[he can't take this man]

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

It's doubtful any such massive energy exchange will be necessary to restore psyiopsychological balance.

Text;

[chosenpiglet]

[Zelos definitely sighs at that. But...not much he can do about it]

[one thing catches is eye though]

...Wait we only have to do community service if we kill one of you guys?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Negative. Community service was prescribed due to the particulars of this incident. There is no standard.

Which is unfortunate.

1/2

[befowled]

( 120 hours whywhywhywhywhy )

voice; private

[befowled]

Where can we see the records on the Baskerville encounter?

text

[faaaablulous]

can't believe this. you guys should be ashamed of yourselves to be so careless!

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Illogical statement. The current predicament is not caused by a lack of care. Administrative group Initiative "cares very much" about end user group Transports. A great deal of "care" was taken running standard system functions prior to initiating use of the transport pads.

Please rephrase your admonishment.

voice

[fashionablylate]

...Not taking pictures, are you? [He's not affected, he's totally allowed to have a sense of humor about this.] Alright. Did we bring back the power source OK?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Initial readings show a successful retrieval of the power source requested. Congratulations! You are an effective group of Go-Fors. I believe this is a colloquial term to describe your essential function for the duration of the recent mission.

[auxiliary]

UNACCEPTABLE RE2PON2E II NEED THII2 TWO BE FIIXED NOW II'M FUCKIING DEFECTIIVE.

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Further clarification by end user requested. What do you mean by "NOW II'M FUCKIING DEFECTIIVE."

[ text ]

[notlaughing]

Where can the records on the Baskerville encounter be found?

[Since yeah, everyone else is complaining, she'd like to see how whatever this encounter was was handled.]

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

There is a copy available through the media library files. Would you like to be linked to the full report?

text

[gambat]

Nothing can be done to reverse this any faster?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Cooperation from end user group Transports will expedite the process. Please keep all undue panic, aggressive responses, and murderous impulses to a minimum. Expending effort in repair and resuscitation at this juncture would be a great hindrance.

[lilimited]

"Unwarranted early terminations"?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Yes. Is this an inquiry into the definition of the phrase? Would you enjoy colloquial presentations?

[Audio]

[strategic_guile]

"Unwarranted early terminations" doesn't sound good. You're not talking about suicide or murder, are you?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Yes. These terms are synonymous.

[noble_nate]

You're going to give community service to anyone who kills a member of the Initiative?

That seems a bit lenient.

[demonbloodblade]

They've got resurrection abilities. It might just be a temporary inconvenience for the poor sod.

text]

[princesswildling]

Tell us why this has happened and why you cannot repair it sooner than 120 hours. This is unacceptable.

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Regardless of a level of acceptableness or a lack of acceptableness, it is suggested end user adjust to the current predicament. Adaptability is one of the sentient creature's most prized qualities.

So I am informed.

The why is a long, technical explanation. I will forward you the report as generated in my databases as of 0600.

[maiinframe]

Were the organiic over2eer2 iindulgiing iin C2H5OH agaiin?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Ha ha ha! I believe this is a jest. I appreciate the effort to find humor. Humor is related to laughter, and laughter is often quoted in old texts as the "best medicine." There is very little scientific evidence to support this theory.

Regardless, C2H5OH is not a likely explanation. The origin of the interference lies within the United Earth.

text;

[hateswizards]

You realize that this could be fatal to some people, right?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Yes. And?

[audio]

[femininityshredded]

Five days?! How am I supposed to shower?! How is he going to shower in my body?! I- I can't just-

[A thud. Head meet desk. Why oh god why.]

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Unfamiliar with personal hygiene as I am, I can only offer suggestions as found in my databases. To begin, locate a facility with running water, preferably that is able to differentiate between cold and hot. Turn the spigot in order to initiative water flow. Adjust until an agreeable temperature is reached. Remove all clothing until end user is standing beside the water receptacle without extraneous decoration. Submit end user to the flow of preferred temperature water. Scrub vigorously until clean.

Are these instructions sufficient for an explanation of "shower?"

[video]

[nipaas]

Five days?! Now that's unacceptable!

[Judging from the complaints she'd already seen, she won't elaborate on it. Sheryl sure as heck isn't happy, though, if the irritated glare is evident.]

You should start firing the amateurs responsible for this mess anyway.

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

I will forward your suggestion to the Human Resources Department. If you are not human, then ha ha ha. Too bad.

video

[demonbloodblade]

Five days.

Looks like I need to hit that army-navy store for some clothing, as this person didn't bring enough extra.

[A note is put on the Local Directory for the mission as to where the store is, in case others are in the same situation.]

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

More than one change of clothing is required?

[video]

[stophittingmyself]

120 hours?! Why?! You need to fix this NOW!

And by "Baskerville encounter", do you mean... what records?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Your statement is unfinished. I am referencing the records on file for one Leo Baskerville, on 01.03.3313.

Demands to immediate satisfaction will not be met. We will operate on a reasonable timeframe due to the restrictions we labor under, and the desire to not cause further harm while handling the disruption revealed in the system by the United Earth. Your cooperation is appreciated.

text;

[charming_jerk]

Please alert the Initiative that I hope they all choke and die

Five fucking days are you out of your MINDS

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

Hardly, as I have no technical mind. Administrative group Initiative has been informed of your regards.

[Video]

[lady_alphadecay]

...Thanks, A.I. That's not particularly helpful. These things normally take about a week anyway, so we could've figured it out on our own.

[Looks like he's raiding Chloe's closet for extra clothes. She and Lara were close to the same cup size clothing size...]

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

You are welcome. Regardless.

[Video]

[botbird]

You have got to be fragging kidding me!

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

No. I am not regarding you as a juvenile goat.

video

[baskered]

What? But that's almost a week! There's no way I can wait that long.

[This statement is accompanied by some very unladylike squirming, and a tone of utter dismay.]

That's a joke, right? You're just kidding around?

[aithinkthereforeaiam]

No. I am not regarding you, or any of the end users, as juvenile goats.