video;

[crab]

[ after a week of constantly bumping into shit and having to get people to lead him around from place to place, karkat vantas has to resort to desperate measures. it's a struggle even getting the tablet to work for him, and at first, he doesn't seem to notice it's recording, continuing to frown and fiddle with it for a little while, before he begins to speak. ]

So. [ one might notice that his pupils are unusually dilated, only the faintest ring of grey iris visible around the edges. ] I'm going to make this brief, if just because I'm only half convinced this thing is actually recording and I'm not just yodeling into the void, but thanks to the astonishingly warm welcome one of your residents gave me, I'm blind. And as I'm not the resident No Eyes Mcgee among my social circle, and I've walked into enough door frames over the past week that I'll be very surprised if I haven't sustained permanent brain injury, I'm requesting that one of you make yourself some vague parody of useful and fix it.

[ there is a pause, before, reluctantly; ]

It was a dragon, if that makes any difference.

Comments

voice

[fintastic]

What? Karkat, what dragon? [ A pause. ] Are you physically hurt, or is it magical?

video;

[crab]

No one. Just some dragon. That's not important, shut up. [ wow a little defensive there. ] It's magical.

video; i meant video up there whoops not like it... matters...

[fintastic]

You should try the clinic, then. There are lots of magical healers there.

[the_human]

I can't help with, like, the magic bit, but I could guide you around and junk.

[crab]

[ well he is kind of lost right now, but he doesn't want to admit that if he doesn't have to. ]

I'm pretty much done with entrusting my mobility to gormless bulge chompers with little to no concept of the fact that they're supposed to stop me from bumping into shit, to be perfectly honest.

[the_human]

Aw, come on, man, I wouldn't do that! Seriously, I'll help you, you won't bump into anything, I promise.

video NOT THAT IT MATTERS HAR HAR

[onblackwings]

It isn't as if you have anyone but yourself to blame.

video;

[crab]

How about you fuck off and choke on a sack of desiccated musclebeast shame globes? That sure sounds like something you should be doing.

[onblackwings]

Mmhmm. There would be an easy way to fix your little problem, as I know you know.

Private, permavid

[governorkang]

What happened?

[Maybe the guy deserved it, maybe he didn't.]

[onblackwings]

[ IMMEDIATELY A FROWN ]

He knows about me, but he won't tell me what he knows.

video

[firstgoldson]

Which one?

[ But he can guess who. :| ]

video;

[crab]

Why does it matter? [ suspiciously. he doesn't actually want to get khisanth in serious trouble... ] I think the more pressing issue is how the fuck I'm going to get my eyes back.

video;

[firstgoldson]

Because due to past incidents I would just like to point to whoever it is that will be accusing me for whatever crime today and say, "Look, that wasn't me this time, you got the wrong dragon."

[ Although he may have been exaggerating, Aurican will never forget the trouble and headache when he was a mere baby dragon for simply being a dragon from other Transports and Exsilium natives. (And if Aurican knew he was accidentally parodying a crime drama, he would have said his excuse differently). ]

But I suppose that is neither here nor there. [ Because as being no longer a wyrmling, but rather an old dragon with sharper wit, any false accusations will be face with a venomous tongue. ] Have any luck with the medics? Have you received a guide?

video;

[bunnivore]

[ of course alice will take hold of this opportunity to announce her superiority, especially after what happened.

she lets out an arrogant laugh, and along with that teasing will follow. ]

Hah! So useless Candy Horns is asking for help now. Maybe if you ask nicely I'll think about helping you.

[ can she even help? probably not. yeah, no. the answer is no. ]

video;

[crab]

I wouldn't ask you for help if I were dying a frothing, screaming death from troll rabies and you were in possession of the only known cure. [ STILL BUTTHURT even if she could help he wouldn't accept it from alice. ]

VOICE.

[badnewsboy]

[there's a weird echo because he is TOTALLY IN THE NEXT ROOM and Karkat can probably hear him talk before it comes over the network. oh well. you know. yolo.]

You've gone blind? Why did you not mention it! I'll get you a dog right away!

video;

[crab]

Wow, why the fuck did you think I was bumbling all over the place, bouncing off the walls all week? I didn't mention it because it was painfully obvious to anyone with the faintest smear of brain tissue in their otherwise cavernous cranial hulls.

not here!!

[hellosailor]

[Sully squints at the weird lookin' little guy as the video plays, but slaps the tablet down the minute he hears the word dragon.]

You've got to be goddamn kidding me.

video;

[hymnals]

Where are you? I can have a look.

video;

[crab]

I'm not entirely sure. [ he hates admitting it. ] I mean, I'm at my housing assignment, but I don't remember the number.

Video

[lexiconning]

A - dragon? ...W-what'd you say to make this dragon that angry, anyway? [ KIND OF BEEN WONDERING...since he definitely wasn't blind the last time he was here, you're kind of freaking her out here Karkat! ]

video;

[crab]

Wow, of course, because I had to have said something to bring this bullshit down on my head. This was one hundred percent my own fault, her overblown ego and inability to recognize what is and isn't her business had nothing to do with it! [ is his indignant response. ]

video, even though karkat can't see that Sollux is consistently holding up his middle finger.

[biwinning]

I'm in awe of how fucking stupid you are, all of the time.

video;

[crab]

I would be in awe of how ugly you are, all of the time, but the one saving grace of my condition is I no longer have to behold your hideous visage. I might even stay blind, just for that reason.