video;

[the_human]

[You've probably seen this kid running around for the last two weeks, shrieking excitedly when he notices you're a human being (or fish person, or troll, or whatever; he's pretty excitable). But it's only now he attacks the network, all smiles and cheer.]

Holy SCHMAO, you guys, I've never seen so many humans! This is amazing! Where I'm from-- well, my name is Finn, first off! Finn the Human, from the land of Ooo! I'm basically a knight there, it's pretty great. I fight evil and stuff with my brother! But I'm the last human being ever, and I've never seen any others before-- but here you all are! Which is awesome!  We should all get together and talk about human stuff. What do you eat? Do you like bacon pancakes? What about--

[Oh wait no he had a message here. Finn takes a breath and adds:]

Anyway, uh-- I know things are kind of bumslops right now, but, uh, you gotta just keep your chin up! Sometimes being a hero means nobody likes you very much, or they think you're wrong, or even making mistakes. But as long as you're trying to do the right thing, you're all right!

Oh, and-- if anybody needs lessons in being a hero, I'm totally free. I've got, like, a billion years experience in it.

Comments

[strategic_guile]

Is he awful because he's weird or weird because he's so awful?

[the_human]

Weird because he's so awful! There's nothing wrong with being weird, but he screams and hits people and tries to hurt them and it's super stupid.

[strategic_guile]

Have you tried putting him in time out? Sometimes that works. [Oh, Blaine. If only you knew about the Dungeons.]