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[the_human]

[You've probably seen this kid running around for the last two weeks, shrieking excitedly when he notices you're a human being (or fish person, or troll, or whatever; he's pretty excitable). But it's only now he attacks the network, all smiles and cheer.]

Holy SCHMAO, you guys, I've never seen so many humans! This is amazing! Where I'm from-- well, my name is Finn, first off! Finn the Human, from the land of Ooo! I'm basically a knight there, it's pretty great. I fight evil and stuff with my brother! But I'm the last human being ever, and I've never seen any others before-- but here you all are! Which is awesome!  We should all get together and talk about human stuff. What do you eat? Do you like bacon pancakes? What about--

[Oh wait no he had a message here. Finn takes a breath and adds:]

Anyway, uh-- I know things are kind of bumslops right now, but, uh, you gotta just keep your chin up! Sometimes being a hero means nobody likes you very much, or they think you're wrong, or even making mistakes. But as long as you're trying to do the right thing, you're all right!

Oh, and-- if anybody needs lessons in being a hero, I'm totally free. I've got, like, a billion years experience in it.

Comments

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[alittlesweptup]

Knighting a bit young in Ooo, are they?

video;

[the_human]

[SHRUG.]

I guess when you're just such a good hero, your princess knows you're destined to be a knight anyway, so you might as well get it done early!

[alittlesweptup]

Well naturally. your princess make a point of conscripting minors or are you the exception?

[the_human]

Uhhh-- I'm sorta the exception, I guess. I don't think she really has a rule either way.

[alittlesweptup]

Seems shady.

but alright, what kind of evil do you and your brother pound into the ground then? we talking like people lifting packets of gum level of evil or something a little more nefarious?

[the_human]

Any sort! People who steal princesses, or steal, or try to murder everyone on the planet!

[alittlesweptup]

Christ. Well that's a bit heavy, isn't it?

[And the kid seems rather cheerful about it too.]

[the_human]

I guess. I dunno. Some people are just evil, and you gotta stop em. That's all there is to it.

[alittlesweptup]

Suppose that's fair enough.

Come to think of it, there's a lot of kids running about playing at vigilante justice here. You ought to join their club.

[the_human]

I'm not a kid, and I don't play at it. ...but maybe I'll check them out.

[alittlesweptup]

Mate, just because you've got a knighthood doesn't make you an adult.

Collette's probably friends with most of them. Seems like her thing. If you haven't met her yet, you will.

[the_human]

Who are you, anyway?

[alittlesweptup]

An adult and therefore an expert on the subject.

[the_human]

That's not a name.

[alittlesweptup]

The name's Cutter.