TEXT

[itase]

Okay. Survey time. Am I seriously the only person here who's not from a world filled with people trying to murder me?

I mean. I had the one. But that was more incidental. I am the definition of collateral damage on that one. But some of you all take it to the next level. Or all the way up to 11, in some cases.

Comments

[itase]

I'm concerned boarding on impressed with that laundry list.

[andhishat]

I have a gift for making things wish to slay me, or perhaps it is the scent of my soap that attracts them.

[itase]

I've heard Axe body spray can have that effect on people. Too much time spent chasing the ladies?

[andhishat]

I do not know what that is, but it sounds unpleasant, and I haven't had much time to pursue any men, women, or humanoids of indiscernible gender in my life, so I don't believe that is it.

[itase]

Now that's just unfortunate. If they're not murdering you over stealing the latest Helen of Troy, what's the sin?

[andhishat]

Existing is enough for most. Some it's because I'm not the sort to bow to ego, others because I've foiled their nefarious schemes. Many seem to believe I would be tasty, and an alarming amount are just too stupid to tell the difference between a helpless damsel and a experienced mage.

[itase]

mage? of the bunny pulling variety?

[andhishat]

It's usually more giant spiders and lizard men, but essentially yes. I also have been known to throw fireballs or conjure illusions on occasion.

[itase]

so they want to burn the witch is what i'm pick up from this conversation.

[andhishat]

Some. Mages are relatively common where I am from, but I'm one with a talent for finding trouble and sticking my nose in it. Many don't seem to appreciate that.

[itase]

curiosity kills cats and wizards, got it.

but that makes your a good witch, right?

[andhishat]

I am a witch with good intentions. Those aren't always the same thing, but for the most part it has worked out for the best.

[itase]

i'll take it.

even if i have always kind of wondered what life would be like as a toad.

[andhishat]

If what I have learned is much to go by, it involves a great deal of sitting around, waiting for things smaller than you to eat, or things larger than you to avoid being eaten by.

Though I am told the crickets are delicious.

[itase]

that sounds a little too close to the current state of my life for comfort.

minus the crickets.