voice

[liprings]

Okay, so, two things.

One, anyone know how to reattach an arm? Like... fuck, I dunno, I guess you could just sew that shit back on. Or like... heal it on? Anyone got any magic wand-waving bullshit for that? Or science it back on, I guess, since holy fuck this is the moon, and all. Hey, are we over that part yet? Cuz I'm pretty fucking jaded. Turns out they weren't kidding when they said that thing about no one hearing you scream in space! They can't hear you bitch in space, either. It blows serious donkey balls out there, once you get your ass over the moonwalking part.

Oh, right, thing two. Anyone seen a decapitated head anywhere? Blond hair, rotted out eyes, answers to Luke? You just lemme know if you seen that little scamp, 'kay? He ran off somewhere, can't turn my back for a goddamn second on that fucker.

[ feel free to have spied Jan's missing head-trophy anywhere around the moon base :') it got shrunken and preserved somewhere along the line, and could pretty much have been left anywhere. ]

Comments

[liprings]

C'mon, sugartits, don't be fuckin' retarded. Luke doesn't have a dick, he's not fucking anything.

But I used to keep him here [ vague thumping on something... because this is audio, thanks jan... ] --so that's probably fine. Get it, mutt!

[irritating]

Well I dunno, does he still have a tongue? He could be usin' that for all I fuckin' know!!

[ A bark and whoosh out the door on a grand adventure with Apollo singing out to him through Jan's tablet as he dashes away. ] Go Metal go, bring Luke home!

[liprings]

All Luke can use his tongue for is reciting fuckin' dictionaries and shit, trust me.

[irritating]

The fuck d'you even have a dictionary for?

[liprings]

I don't, fuck you! It's Luke's.

[ buying heads dictionaries since


3313? ]

[irritating]

Why couldn't you get him somethin' good though!! Dictionaries are just fuckin'... words! [ so is every other book in existence but you know what she means, maybe ]

[liprings]

I tried offering up some skinrags, but... dude's a prude, what can I do?

[irritating]

Guess the whole missin' dick thing really takes the fun outta the little guy, huh? We should get him a pussyless girlfriend, maybe that'd put a little spunk in him.

[liprings]

Dude right? I'm thinkin', like... I dunno, maybe a single tit?

[ thoughtful pause... ]

We could call her Integra.

[irritating]

Fuck yeah, that'd be one cute little body part couple. [ jesus christ these two should never play matchmaker ever ]

Why Integra? She an all boobs friend o' yours?

[liprings]

Naw, she's one of the bitches that got me killed. Her tits weren't bad, though.

[irritating]

How many fuckin' times have you died again?

Integra sounds like a real asshole though, y'think Luke really wants a lady like that?

[liprings]

Just twice! Which is pretty fucking good, considering. [ considering how obnoxious he is, at least. ]

And naw, probably not. But who says Luke's getting a choice?