exsilium | 10 △ VIDEO; looking fine and augmented

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10 △ VIDEO; looking fine and augmented

[ Considering Adam spent the last two weeks as his old self, that is, the person he was before this and that incident, he takes it remarkably well. The memory of actual, feeling hands is still fresh in his mind, although he hadn't even been able to appreciate it much due to it having been nothing special at the time. It's easier to compare now, however—flesh to metal, feeling to unfeeling, weak to powerful. And for once, the lingering emotion of something having been taken from him against his will doesn't flare up again.

It's different. Much like a disabled person revisits the memory and place where everything happened and changed to maybe, finally, find some closure.

Things happen.

You don't always get a say in it. All you can do is deal, adapt and progress, because ultimately, that's what life has always been about. ]

***

I see everyone's quick to mope or make apologies. Excuse me if I refrain from joining your ranks this time, seeing as I came out of this with a few cute girls, free meals and a videogame—all things I didn't ask for, but I'm still not sharing. The game, maybe, if you ask nicely, but it's somewhat dated. So unless you can appreciate classics, don't even bother.

[ HI everyone did you miss this butt he's sure you did. ]

Oh, and here's your general PSA, directed at no one in particular, especially not the guys around the precinct: get into the habits of locking your tablets if you're just gonna leave 'em lying around. The next time I find one I'm gonna post the entirety of its porn folder to the network tagged with your name. And before you go, oh, that silly Adam Jensen, of course my porn folder is locked and hidden slash I'm an innocent virgin who doesn't even have a porn folder, honest--

Don't make the mistake of thinking that's gonna stop me.

[ Private to Samus ]

You free tonight?

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At least you would have the courtesy of punching me in the gut and telling me what's up before running away.

[ Sigh ! ]

Did I say something wrong? [ Since you followed that exchange and all. ] I mean I know I did before, but I don't know what warrants such a sudden reaction unless I hit the nail on the head.

[Yeah, she would. To his question she inhales deeply, almost in response to his sigh. Silence for a few moments as she tries to find words to her thoughts.]

...Could be. Maybe she just wants you to trust her. If she is taking on a destructive habit--which I don't commend, by the way--it's still her choice.

...Samus.

Do you know what meth does to people? Have you ever heard of it, where you're from?

[srsly Adam]

Methamphetamine, a psychostimulant. Dangerous if taken in excess like any other drug.

Textbook definition. But you haven't had to deal with junkies in the streets. You haven't watched people decay over years, turning into something less than human. And if it's not meth it's something else.

[ Not everyone is as lucky as Adam. ]

People can do whatever the fuck they want to their bodies, but she's sixteen. And I swear to god if I find out that son of a bitch has been feeding her meth I will rip him a new one.

Edited 2013-02-03 08:51 (UTC)

[Her tone becomes more terse, even offended sounded.]

Don't assume I don't understand, Adam. I've had to put bullets through my own allies after they were corrupted by a substance far more dangerous than any Earthen drug could even hope to compare to. They were driven mad from it--from Phazon sickness--physically mutated and turned into a bastardized form of what they once were. There was no saving them.

[Tch.]

Don't assume I don't know how dangerous it can be, and don't jump to assumptions there either.

[YEAH NOW SHE'S GOING BACK TO MOTHERING YOU AGAIN.]

You want to find him, fine, but find evidence. You're a cop, you're supposed to be good at that part, right?

[ Fuck you, mom. ]

But we're not in space, Samus. As far as I'm concerned, I'm on earth, with normal, everyday earth problems. You're still somewhere out there fighting some big galactic war on your own were sacrifices have to be made because you think that's what you have to do.

This is about a girl I happen like because she makes my days a little more bearable. Has it ever been about that for you?

'This is about some guy I like'. Not about the galaxy or whatever. Ask yourself that, just once. And then tell me again I shouldn't jump to assumptions. I wanted to take you out tonight, on a proper date and not to fuck, because that was about some woman I like.

But I know you would've said no. Because I'm here and you're still somewhere up there.

And you know what? I don't have time for this. I'm sorry about calling you. Again.

[oh my god Adam is babies. Adam is big babies right now. She's about to point out that the utter weakness in his argument in that this isn't a normal every day Earth either, instead some dystopian future Earth under oppressive rule of bloated government run by an AI--when suddenly it twists and turns into something personal.

Wh... take her out? On a date? Did she hear that correctly?]

Adam.

[It's clipped--urgent, as if to say "wait a minute." What she follows up sounds dark and serious.]

I would've said no because all you're doing is using me and Collette as a excuse to vindicate your grievances.

You haven't grown up at all from last week.

So do yourself a favor, and don't bother calling again until you do.

[HANGING UP. Ouch.]

Edited (fuck a million typos DAMN IT MORE) 2013-02-03 10:35 (UTC)

[ But that's not the point Samus because these are still very normal, earth, human problems involving interpersonal relationships, you know, that one thing you don't know very much about-- ]

The only one who hasn't grown up is you.

[ But she probably didn't even catch that anymore. He remembers last week, how she was then, claiming she was supposed to be in space and quite the dutiful young woman, and he also remembers that being happy was such a simple affair for him. Just be with people. Be forward, don't retreat.

Samus, though. The real reason you would've said no is because it would give you an excuse--a reason--to let go of all that other shit.

Letting go of shit is something Adam wants to do, too. But fine. He's not going to call again. Probably. Because there is only so much of

i love you, but it's okay, you don't have to love me back

he can do without feeling like he's chasing ghosts again. It seems like certain things are just unreachable. One's sitting somewhere up inside her ivory tower, the other's lost herself in the vastness of space, and Collette is a goddamn eagle that refuses to come down right now.

And Adam, well, unlike Icarus he'd never been able to fly. Only survive when he comes crashing down, and that's quite often. ]

[So after much inner turmoil and deliberation, a certain someone could not think of a single damn reason why Samus wouldn't be obstinately stubborn about this exchange and not give Adam a classic Ice Queen Aran cold shoulder.

How dare he. How dare he think she wouldn't understand what it was like--how awful it was--to risk losing someone to drugs, or war, or the very nature of their profession?

If anything, Adam was the one who didn't understand, in her humble opinion, as evident by letting his feelings get muddled in with said profession. There was a reason Samus didn't just open her heart to anyone--because the risk of losing someone she cared about hurt too much. She'd lost enough people in her life, and she wasn't sure she could stand losing anymore; to not be able to protect them.

So the nature of their relationship should theoretically be as simple as that; Adam and Samus, no strings attached.

So why did it bother her so much in the hours and days following that abruptly heated and then abruptly ended conversation? It was like a dark cloud hanging over head and left her so insufferably irritable, easily noticeable to anyone in the nearby vicinity despite her never directly admitting it; her steps carried more weight, her words were clipped and often growled, reports dropped onto desks with careless slaps, the usual lack of a smile on her face was more like a scowl, and the training modules in the Hold suffered her wrath, excessively so.

If there were no strings attached, she wouldn't feel hurt if something (inevitably) happened to Adam, nor would she feel hurt if Adam happened to do something to her. She especially wouldn't be acting like she had a stick permanently lodged up her ass. (...more than usual, anyway.)

But it did, somehow. She didn't understand. She cared. It freighted her. it made her feel vulnerable. Feeling frightened and vulnerable made her angry. Realizing she was feeling angry made her bottle it up more and more.

Until it would eventually inevitably explode from the inevitable eventual run-in of Adam and Samus working in the same building.

And it wouldn't take much more than a missing piece of chocolate from a very hidden recess of her desk to go missing before that happened. Maybe he had nothing at all to do with it, but it was as good of an excuse as any to hunt him down.

Enough of this childish game.]

[ He spends his day relieving his co-workers of their worldly possessions and playing Zork, glad there are no more strings--connecting him and Prestor, that is. Either the guy's dead or he's gone, and Adam would be happy with either possibility. The point is--once more, he doesn't have to give a damn about anything. Suits him just fine.

But he still does, of course.

You are in a dimly lit forest, with large trees all around. To the
east, there appears to be sunlight.

> call samus

I don't understand that.

And expects too much, hoping to be surprised. Whatever. He reaches for an open can of soda which is definitely not his, takes a sip, and continues to battle the white text on his black computer screen, when the door to his office opens.

... Surprise, surprise. ]

How can I help you, Mrs Aran?

[ He sounds cordial enough, but he's already not looking forward to this. ]

[Samus killed Prestor after their first and last encounter, obviously.]

I have a security issue, Mr. Jensen.

[She reflects his tone back perfectly at him, closing the door behind her and planting her palms at the edge of his desk.]

Something went missing from my desk.

[ Good job, Samus. Adam makes himself appear busy by punching something or other into his computer via the keyboard, but in reality he's still just playing a text adventure. He's not even looking at her.

You are in a dimly lit forest, with large trees all around. One
particularly large tree with some low branches stands here.

> climb up tree and never come back down

I don't understand that.

> fuck off

Oh, dear. Such language from a supposedly winning adventurer! ]

What exactly, and when?

[Her eyes flit down to the keyboard, only able to make out the profanity he typed. She's not sure if he's instant messaging someone or trying to passive aggressively jab at her, but she deems it inappropriate either way.]

Maybe something as benign as chocolate.

[Dark. Dark and bitter. She's not mentioning that detail though to see if he foolishly slips up on his own without her help.]

Maybe something as important as a confidential document--[Tilting his monitor a few degrees away from him.]--does it really matter what?

If you are incapable of doing your job, I'm going to do it for you.

[She says this slowly, leaning forward across his desk, closer and closer to his face.]

[ Wow, Samus, rude. Two can play the passive aggressive game. ]

Not sure what you're insinuating. I'm actually having my break right now, for your information; so you could be a little bit nicer considering I'm still taking the time to listen to your very important concerns.

[ And he tilts the monitor right back, and the same goes for himself, to stop her from getting all up in his face. And again,

> fuck off

It's not so bad. You could have been killed already.

> you dont even give a shit

I don't understand that. ]

You're on break--isn't that so convenient.

[She tilts the monitor back again, like it's a see-saw, but Samus keeps her stare fixated on Adam. Her eyes are smouldering and intense; filled with emotion despite her expertly keeping it all out of her voice and off her face.]

Last time I checked thieves don't care if you're on break or not.

[You took something from me, something I can't even put into words.]

[ Guess who's hitting the escape key now to quit the game? There's nothing interesting on the monitor otherwise, probably just an open document with some random code.

So he lets go of the monitor. She can have it if she wants. ]

What's your problem, Samus? We're done, don't even pretend for one damn second this is about a missing candybar.

[ Of course they're not done and he cannot blame her for being angry after what he said last time, but he still stands by what he said. She's living in the past, if those two weeks had proven anything... He sounds terse, gritting his teeth. ]

I was expecting too much. I get it. You have every right to be angry at me. So get it out of your system, and then please leave, because believe it or not, this is painful for me, too.

[ In the heartache kind of way. ]

[She doesn't want the monitor so much as she wants his damned attention and knowing that makes it all the more infuriating.

She lurches forward suddenly, grabbing him at the collar of his shirt, not caring if anything on his desk got scattered or knocked off in the process.]

One; next time you ask for my opinion, don't get your fucking ballsack in a twist if it's not what you wanted or expected to hear.

Two; You're right--this isn't about a trivial candy bar. This thief took something much more important from me.

[...Not that she would mind having her chocolate back.]

[ Too bad. It's in Adam's stomach now, so any attempt at getting it back would turn out kind of messy.

Looks like this is going to be messy anyway, and for once, he doesn't feel like reciprocating and pushing back. Told her to get it out of her system, after all, and he's by god no stranger to getting beaten up.

Although, he's pretty sure he didn't take anything from Samus' desk--some candy, yeah, he vaguely remembers that, but nothing that would prompt this kind of reaction. Maybe someone else did really steal something... huh.

Well here, he's even gonna retract the shades so she can see how he's narrowing his eyes. ]

So I have to suffer for it? Sure know how to make a guy feel special, Samus. What was taken? That big bloated empty space so important to you? I'm so fucking sorry.

[ ... yeah she's gonna beat him. Guess he's asking for it this time. ]

[She tightens her grip and then sharply tugs downwards to make him kiss the desk with a loud slam.]

Stop.

What you've taken isn't even tangible. You...

[Took my attention and concentration away from my. Took my thoughts. Make me worry. Make me care. Make me...feel.

She doesn't know how to put any of this into words, of course, and falls into frustrated silence as she keeps her grip tightly on him--certain this isn't love but... it's one hell of a feeling he's making her feel. Hell, has been making her feel for awhile.

It's heated. Bottled up. Ready to explode in his face again.]

You're not sorry.

[ He groans against the flat surface of his desk--yeah, that hurt, and his medical implant is telling him much the same. It's a surprise his nose isn't broken--although it's still bleeding a little--his shades definitely would be.

There is nothing to regret.

Sometimes he feels like he should regret ever falling for Megan, for getting tangled up in that whole mess that cost him his life, multiple times. But he knows that it wasn't his fault, and blaming other people doesn't really change anything in the long run; at most, it makes you feel better for a little while.

That while has passed. Time to move on. ]

... I don't know what to be sorry for.

[ He doesn't know what she means. Adam uses his hands to push against the table and effectively, her, though he doesn't do anything to free himself from her firm grip. ]

For being human? For having flaws? For getting frustrated? For...

[ Having fucking feelings? ]

...ugh.

Yeah.

[That's about all she can articulate as she draws herself closer over the desk, knuckles still white from how tightly she's gripping him.

For being human. Something she has such a difficult time coming to terms with. Samus views herself as merely human yet treats herself like anything but. She didn't have room in her life for being human. She had a legacy of not one but two dead alien races to carry. She had a galaxy to save. She had bounties and scum of the universe to hunt. She had to carry the world on her shoulders when no one else could. Because she had to.

But did that really apply or even matter anymore, down here in Exsilium, in this Police Station, over his desk like this...?

...Maybe she really was stuck out there... in space...

But Samus didn't know how to live any other way.]

For all that.

[Adam knew how to be human. He knew how important it was to keep his humanity despite having so much taken from him. Samus envied his ability to be, well, down to earth when it mattered.

And right now all that mattered to her was releasing all those pent up flaws and feelings and frustrations she was having--be human and not regret it, even if just for a moment.]

...I don't think I'm sorry either.

[Samus closes what little gap was left and crushes her lips over his, immediately tasting the tang of blood. She didn't regret that, either.

Adam was asking for it, anyway.]

[ Well, surprise.

He expected many things from her, the majority of them violent in nature, and he'd be fine with that--he knows he'll heal and keep functioning. To be honest, he's not quite sure what's going on right now, but apparently the things he's said to her (and then didn't, for days after) did leave something of a dent, if she's furious enough to not be able to decide on whether she wants to punch or kiss him.

He flails a little. All in all, he's glad he's been shut up, and while he didn't reciprocate the violence (rare, for him, cantankerous as he can be) he does start to reciprocate the affection by clumsily kissing back, already having decided that he needs more of that in his life. Hard to stay mad when someone feels so strongly about you.

He might be grabbing one of her shoulders now, for the sole purpose of pulling her aross and over the desk... ]

[She's glad he does reciprocate, not that she really expected him to resist, though with how much passion she has bottled up it's doubtful his considerations would really come into the equation. Samus needs to blow off some steam, almost desperately at this point.

But admittedly, there was a little more to it than that--she could easily do that in a number of ways that didn't involve him. Adam... she needed him for this. He caused this and she needed him to rectify it. Her. Them.

Her lightweight body offers little resistance over the desk, though some more papers and items inevitably get knocked down to the ground as she's pulled. Once her feet find their way back on solid ground, she's on the assault again, pushing him violently up against the back wall as she continues to force herself on Adam. Kisses, bites, even gropes through his pants--all heated and dangerous.]

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10 △ VIDEO; looking fine and augmented

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I SUCK. [surprise action]

only adam's co-- okay I wont go there

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