exsilium | 06 △ VIDEO

[ Video--coming from Adam's tablet for once, and not his retinal enhancements. it shows him, obviously in his messy apartment, and obviously... different from what one might be used to. he's neither properly dressed nor his usual stoic, composed, monotone self.

but most notably, the lenses of his shades--which are mounted to his head--are retracted. his eyes are visibly artificial. here's the usual gravely voice: ]

...And they keep dragging more and more people here. Or is that the machine malfunctioning again? Can't be sure anymore.

Anyway, hello. My name's Adam Jensen and I'm -- [ insert vague, dismissive gesture here--his hand, too, is artificial and looks like it's made out of black metal. ] ... who the fuck even cares. I'm the local oversized can opener. Hi.

[ if it wasn't obvious before that he's drunk, it's sure as hell now. ]

Given the uh, premise under which you all arrived here as well as the popularity of thought-provoking surveys lately, let's talk about a topic each of you surely can contribute to with a story or two. Since I couldn't help but notice that we're quite a miserable bunch of misfits. Exceptions prove the rule by the way.

[ pause, during which he reaches off screen... for his smoke. ]

So, broken dreams. There's a pretty catchy song on them by Green Day which I can only recommend. But before you scurry off to find it, why don't we share with the class why we're all so damn bitter, and not only since we ended up in this shithole. Though I guess the shithole made it worse, in some cases. I don't know. Getting it off your chest might have a soothing effect, or something.

[ another pause, and he seems pensive for a moment. ~~he might be able to offer alternative treatment methods for your troubles which may involve punching~~ ahem. ]

Here, I'll start. I was planning to get married not too long ago, start a family. I had the perfect girl, a decent job I liked and paid well, and then--then science happened.

[ a dry, humorless chuckle. ]

Gotta love science. Your turn.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Fixing your relationship with your rabbit, I meant.

Oh she'll get over it. Do I look like the type to be relenting towards any kind of bunny?

No, I suppose not.

Exactly.

Are you cooking right now?

[ there are a lot of sarcastic things he could say right now, but they would probably be lost on the intoxicated ]

No.

[ probably. ]

Well you should. And when you're done, leave some for me.

[ adam you know not what you ask ]

If you're looking for someone to cook for you, you could've just put out an ad for that from the start.

[ shut up and make me a sammich you're the woman in the justice trio ]

I wasn't. I got hungry just now.

[ wow!!! ]

I'm sure you'll find a way to avoid starving.

But then mom will start complaining at me about my eating habits again. You could save me from that. Consider it another heroic deed.

[ "Mom"? ]

I'm on break.

Bullshit. You are a terrible hero. Terrible!

Technically, I'm retired, anyway.

[ HOW'S THAT FOR VOLUNTEERING INFORMATION. Although he was getting the paperwork in order to come back into the business just as he got dropped into Exsilium. ]

What? Heroes don't retire. Especially not at that age. And when they do they need a successor. Where is yours?

There were plenty of other Heroes to take care of Sternbild. But when you put it like that, maybe it was just as well I was getting ready to end it before I got here.

[ BUT YOU GOTTA PASS ON THE BUNNY EARS I mean torch ]

But why.

Why quit, you mean?

Yyyeah, that.

Edited 2012-11-14 12:34 (UTC)

There were some things I wanted to do. [ Finding himself, etc. which after a year he'd gotten no closer to doing so that was a bust ] You can't be a Hero and have your attention too divided.

... Don't tell me you wanted to fulfill your childhood dream of becoming a three star chef?

[ okay, he smiles ]

Truthfully, I don't think I'd qualify as any kind of chef, even if I put another twenty years into it.

[ some skillsets are not meant to be ]

[ progress!! ]

Yeah? Never know until you try it. Maybe you can even--work in your superpower. Somehow. Make it special.

It'd be much faster for you to just get takeout.

But that either requires me to leave the house, or call the pizzaman. I'm sure as hell not doing the former right now, and I've eaten pizza the last three days, so in conclusion your idea sucks.

I hear domesticated rabbits aren't as hard to catch.

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