016 ♓ video

[fintastic]

[ A very eager young face pops into full view on the screen, the second the video comes on, and she doesn't hesitate getting right down to business. ]

So this is kind of a different question than usual, but...

Does anyone know how to get married, and where to do it? Thank you in advance!

[ If human movies and soap operas are any indication, getting married is like going on a date but also having a party at the same time, right? Yes, that must be accurate, but they were never quite clear on the specifics... ]

Comments

video;

[5055034455]

[...why is she asking about marriage.]

Why are you asking about marriage?

video;

[fintastic]

It's a human tradition, isn't it?

[5055034455]

I guess you could say that. But your wording's got me a little concerned, kiddo. Is this just for research, or...?

[fintastic]

Research for now! But someday I would like to do it.

[5055034455]

I did it three times. It's not worth the trouble.

[J-j-jaded~]

[fintastic]

Maybe you just didn't find the right person!

[5055034455]

You can say that again. Anyway, marriage is a legal and-slash-or religious thing. You need a marriage license from some kind of church or state official, usually. Uh — that's how it works in my world, anyway.

[fintastic]

I don't get religion, though. Can't I just do it without any of those things? Like on TV!

[5055034455]

You'll still need one from the state. Hypothetically speaking. But none of that really applies here, so...

[fintastic]

So I can just do whatever I want!

[5055034455]

[Feferi please stop.

This is so alarming.]

Let's not jump to conclusions. You in some kinda rush to tie the knot, or what?

[fintastic]

Should I be? No, I am going to wait for now! And make it really awesome!

[5055034455]

Yes. Good. Good plan. You're too young for boyfriends, anyway. Or — uh, girlfriends. Or whatever.

[fintastic]

That's not true! Sollux has been my boyfriend since before I even got here!

[5055034455]

[WHOA.

HOLD ON.

BACK THE HELL UP.

Feferi's dating Sollux? They work together. How did Saul not notice? He notices these things. He would have noticed.

Shit, how little attention has he been paying the rest of the world?

...wait.]

Sollux?

[fintastic]

Yes, Sollux! There is a reason we go home together all the time.

[5055034455]

[Congratulations, Feferi!

You've officially grossed Saul out!

Just look at his face!]

[fintastic]

What? What is that look for?

[5055034455]

You are not marrying Sollux.

[fintastic]

Why wouldn't I? He loves me, and I love him too!

[5055034455]

[Okay, okay.

Let's be rational about this, Saul.

He takes a breath, then shakes his head.]

That doesn't mean you have to run off and tie the knot. Marriage is just a formality. Unnecessary paperwork, really.

[fintastic]

So? It is a good opportunity to incorporate more human culture into our lives! In the interest of diplomacy, it's a great idea!

[5055034455]

Why are we talking about diplomacy? What does diplomacy have to do with anything?

[fintastic]

That's the whole point! Adopt some Earth customs, do things humans do, integrate into society... it's good for troll human relations!

[5055034455]

Marriage isn't good for any relations.