( text )

[mallarkey]

[ He doesn't actually really like text; he's not great with technology and there's bound to be some spelling/grammar errors, but right now he trusts typing more than his ability to keep a professional tone. So be it. ]

Hi.

First things first this isnt going to be a lecture. Tensions are high enough and Ive barely been here long enough to have the whole history down yet. (Working on it) Besides, you've already herd plenty of it. So this isnt about that.

[ Not overtly, anyway. He's trying to do the "subtlety" thing. He's not taking notes or anything. ]

I'm Doug by the way. Mostly I'm trying to figure everything out still, you know. That sort of thing. I'm a curious and openminded sort of person wich is why I have some questions:

1. Whats your favorite thing about being here?
2. And least favorite thing?
3. If you had to make up 1 rule what would it be?
4. Why's the coffee so bad & Are there vending machines (where)?

Thank you thats all.

Comments

[doubleoohbaby]

I can't imagine you have much at the moment. Don't mind I owe yous. Something of equal value at a later date, more alcohol, cigarettes, cigars, that sort of thing.

[mallarkey]

I can swing that. Cigarettes and cigars, no problem. Any brands in specifik?

[doubleoohbaby]

The good ones.

Turkish and Balkan cigarettes. Cuban cigars. Good luck getting your hands on any of them.

Bottle to your room or would you rather chat about the weather up here while we share it?

[mallarkey]

Good luck- do I need it? Im pretty good at finding things.

Either/or but I try not to make a habit out of drinking alone. I dont know what your policy is.

[doubleoohbaby]

Then lets hope you're good at finding these, for my sake.

My policy is that if you can make it to the west wing as a visitor after following very specific instructions on where to find a certain bottle of something, then I'd be all too glad for the company.

[mallarkey]

Fingers crossed then. Failing that I'll owe you a favor.

Cant get it yourself? [ ... ] Whats the story with the west wing?

[doubleoohbaby]

Temporary cells for extremely dangerous convicted criminals. Rapists, murderers, that sort of thing. Lovely bunch, the lot of us.

[mallarkey]

Oh. Maybe that calls for a rain check then. What did you do?

[doubleoohbaby]

I dared to revolt against a dictatorship.

[mallarkey]

Oh. Involved in the mutiny? No that didnt go so good.

[doubleoohbaby]

At least it got people thinking. Could have done without the weeks in lock up though.

[mallarkey]

What did you expect would happen?

[doubleoohbaby]

Applause and adoration.

[mallarkey]

[ If this wasn't text he might gone "hah" outloud. Good thing. ]

Well everyone makes mistakes.

[doubleoohbaby]

[Maybe James should have been a comedian.]

I think I heard some silent applause out there.

[mallarkey]

[ Is he flashy enough for it though?? ]

But if someone applauds silently and nobody is around to see them does it make a sound?

[doubleoohbaby]

A fine point.

And one I cannot answer.

Still, you wouldn't destroy a man's dreams, would you?

[mallarkey]

Oh no. Perish the thought. Its a man's basic right to dream.