exsilium | 002 * kittens for everyone

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002 * kittens for everyone

[Well, here's a face...actually no one will likely recognize besides Liam's roommates and a couple other people, because Liam has refused to go back to normal form for a while.

But he has noticed a kittens. Initially, anyone who saw the post might have heard some sort of godawful speech that came out of his mouth, a really terrible and unknowable language, insanity-causing hallucinations and ear-bleeding optional.

Within seconds, it is replaced.]

--Yesss!

[...Signs point to him having done this deliberately.]

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[KITTEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh it's Liam still being. Weird.

But kitten!]

you seriously did that on purpose? well it's a pretty cute kitten.

[he is so delighted to do this, he's bursting in here like a KoolAid man] Liam, as your newest close companion and ally in the war against illiteracy, I volunteer to read these words out loud to you.

Um--Alright, Christopher.

[HE STILL DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED WITH ELAINE LAST TIME But sure, why not!]

[yessss]

The message is from Kido. Utterly failing to maintain her tough gang boss exterior, she exclaimed with hardly masked softness that the feline you produced was adorable—or in her words, 'cute.'

Oh, and she saw the intent of your actions, too.

[He kind of laughs a little because--yeah, that sounds like Kido alright.]

Well, I did do it on purpose, Miss Kido, you were right about that.

I like kittens. Puppies, too, but this only seems to make kitten pictures appear.

[She's going to try not to sound embarrassed.]

Yeah, cats are pretty all right. I like them. I wonder what's going on with that anyway?

It seems like it's happening whenever someone says things that shouldn't be on the network! I figured the Old Tongue would sound enough like something to trip it, and I was right.

But I'm not really sure how any of it works. It'd be better if they were real kittens, but I guess that wouldn't be any good on the moon.

I don't think you can make real kittens just appear out of nowhere anyway, right? That'd be a pretty cool magic trick though... Like when they pull bunnies out of a hat.

I don't think I can make bunnies or kittens.

I can probably make fish.

A fish? I guess that'd be good if we were hungry for fish though.

Probably! I learned how to fish when I was really little, I can cook them if we need to. The oil's good for a bunch of stuff, too.

Ah geez now I just want some fish. I didn't know you could cook though. Do you like to?

Now and then! It's fun, but I can't really do anything fancy and it's lonely to cook for yourself, so I sort of fell out of practice.

Everyone should know how to cook a little bit, though. It's just common sense.

Eh? Why don't you help me cook sometime then. The others can a little but I'm usually the one doing everything. You can eat with us too if you want.

That sounds like fun...I haven't cooked for a large group of people in a really long time.

Then how about it? We don't have any fussy eaters, though Kano likes sweets a lot and Kisaragi will probably eat anything weird...

[THIS IS JUST FOR YOU CHRISTOPHER!!!!!!]

shut up!!! i'm still a cool boss!!! i was calling it cute for his sake!!

[oh, but he has a moral and ethical duty to let Liam know what is being said!]

And in this comment, she tried to mask her soft nature by demonstrating a rather weak aggression and claiming her statement was all in your name. Isn't it sad to see how young people aggrandize themselves through violence and denial of those things which make them happiest? My, I'm starting to choke up just thinking about it! Let me take this moment to mourn the suffocating of a kinder heart by the callous hands of power and survival!

I think she's still very amazing, even if she's sweet and a little bit shy. In fact, those things just make Miss Kido even more so, wouldn't you agree Christopher?

Oh, of course. It's the contradictory and dissonant aspects that make human personalities so vibrant.

I think it's cute.

what are you even talking about now? i didn't deny anything!

No, you can't keep going like this. Denying denial is just too dull.

Kido's so adorable and sweet, pretending to be tough~ σ(≧ε≦ｏ)

You aren't allowed!!! don't even start! ah, christopher, don't listen to this idiot got it?!

But those aren't the sorts that Kido likes the best~ There needs to be a lot more kittens, a lot, looooot more!

shhh before christopher starts saying what you're saying!!!

[oh he's not stopping]

Kano expressed his intense teenaged attraction to Kido's salted crème brûlée personality—or would it be better to call her some kind of shellfish? Then Kido typed the verbal equivalent of a stuttering blush and shriek, and Kano further indulged in his attraction until Kido foolishly told him to be quiet in public as if I wouldn't just say it all whether or not she said that to him.

we weren't flirting shut up already!!! i'm not a crème brûlée or a shellfish!!! or any food!!

[Let her die now.]

Now Kido has understandably mistaken my reference to shellfish as a reference to food, when in fact I was trying to draw an example out of nature. Perhaps a turtle or porcupine would be a more apt example? Regardless, she reinterpreted my words as reference to flirting, which I just can't help but think of as proof that we're witnessing a couple publicly courting each other. Goodness, this sort of thing never happened when I was their age!

[switching this to audio SO KIDO AND CHRISTOPHER CAN HEAR HIM CACKLING FROM HIS ROOM]

[Audio so that Kano's death can be heard by everyone involved.]

That cat is really cute. Where did it come from?

[Uu is this magic uu]

Unabashedly embracing her sweet and charming side, Mary is masking her monstrous awareness of the supernatural by asking where the cat comes from.

Oh--I don't really know, Miss Mary! It doesn't look like any magic I've ever seen.

But it's really cute.

What? Why is he reading what I write like that?

I thought it was magic because it keeps happening. But maybe it's the computers.

As Mary doesn't know you can't read, she just expressed curiosity as to why I'm reading what she says out loud. Then she implied the basic misunderstanding about the idea that magic and technology are different, when of course they're really just leaning more one way or another on an interconnected scope of artificial manipulations that humankind makes on the world.

[...okay that took him a moment.] As he said, Miss Mary, I can't read english, so he's helping me by telling me what people are asking.

I suppose it could be magic cast on the computers, also.

[-- Oh, right. She remembers now. This boy is the same as the one from before. Right. Yes. He doesn't know how to read, but if she speaks to him...

Well, as long as he can't see her face.]

S-Sorry -- sorry, I forgot... you couldn't --

Um, but -- the cats... are really cute...!

Adorable.

Isn't it?

[Kittens, Tsuzuki. Kittens. They solve everything.]

[It's TRUE.]

So that's the trick to get it to show kittens?

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002 * kittens for everyone

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liam gets audio now!!!

tsun harder, kido.

she totally can

bring it on

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audio HE IS PERFORMING A SERVICE

Audio; you're the best friend ever

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