A short list without an App to list it (Audio & Text)

[badnewsboy]

[the feed clicks to audio, and suddenly there's a very loud enthusiastic greeting.]

Hellooooo Exsilium!

Nailed it.

[the greeting ends as soon as its last syllable of "um" drops, and the post switches to text.]

Great! Everyone heard that, right? Now that the whole pleasantries thing is out of the way (as well as our B-Movie undead run-for-your-life quasi-fiasco), there are some suggestions that I must present to make us all the more comfortable. Please kindly lend your ears and open your hearts! The Initiative is welcome to take such suggestions, so I hope you've your ears open. I've condensed these to a brief number! Onward!

(1) A party every Saturday featuring the round Italian pastry covered in a copious variety of cured meats. I also propose that we're offered a number of stylish festive hats for the occasion. Top hats are in season, and nothing is complete without some kind of festive hat to show our enthusiasm.

(2) While I hardly mean to offend the technology offered to us by our captors, we're left regrettably with a single App that does a single boring thing and absolutely no games! I would settle for Birds of the Angry Emotional Feelings, or perhaps the Saga of Crushed Candy! Anything mind-numbing to pass the time. Even some Exsilium produced space-cat forum!

As a side note, anything of interest and practical use may also be warranted for App exploration. Perhaps something for these "missions" I've heard so much about. Or lists. Yes, lots and lots of Apps for lists. Perhaps a App of lists that lists all the App lists.

(3) Also include the Internet On-Line World in the suggestion above.

(4) I suspect it vital that we all learn how to walk on the moon. We're in luck! I've heard of what's appropriately dubbed "the moon walk." It's a series of difficult steps in Midgardian dance that cause the illusion that you're walking forward, yet you're walking back! Quite helpful in the scheme of things while we take residence.

This is a very small list for those of us who have been captured from our homes and drafted into an unknown future-war that none of us even had suspect of happening! All in favor of boosting morale.

Oh, yes.

I see that some of you are quite aware of the handle of "Loki." If you could give me any such knowledge of your experiences with this fellow I would be eternally grateful. Eternally grateful ... IN SPACE!


Posted from my StarkPhone

Comments

[doubleoohbaby]

This all sounds entirely rational and logical.

Especially the moonwalking.

[badnewsboy]

I'm known for it. The rationale and logic, not for walking on the moon.

If I were, I would be executing that right about ... now.

[doubleoohbaby]

Why not give it a try now? I'll watch. From inside.

[badnewsboy]

Sadly, I believe a bit more practice is needed before I can execute my skills in a formidable fashion. Hence the suggestion.

[doubleoohbaby]

Will you be holding classes to teach it?

[badnewsboy]

If only I was so talented. Do you know how to dance?

[doubleoohbaby]

Not well enough to walk on the moon. I believe only MJ himself could have achieved such greatness.

[badnewsboy]

Then we'll have to surpass with our own level of expertise!

You must have some kind of secret ability, even if it's not moon walking. Everyone does.

[doubleoohbaby]

I make a fine Vodka Martini and I drink it expertly too.

[badnewsboy]

I want a vodka martini. Can you teach me to drink it expertly?

[doubleoohbaby]

I don't see why not. Although that might have to wait until I've got my hands on some vermouth. At the moment I've only got a poor excuse for vodka and a few bottles of whiskey.

[badnewsboy]

It sounds as if you're afflicted with very bad variety. Very bad variety of drink!

[doubleoohbaby]

[This kid... What even.]

And how do you suppose I rectify it?

[badnewsboy]

[this is what happens when you come from a place where they put mead in baby bottles.]

We're gifted with missions. So ... brew your own, of course! Make it a personal detour, no one will be any the wiser.

[doubleoohbaby]

Batch I've got still needs time. Might have to resort to missions at this rate.

[badnewsboy]

We can't travel through time in hopes of reaching it when it reaches its alcohol-type maturity?

[doubleoohbaby]

I think we'd do better on a booze run.

[badnewsboy]

When you say it that way, it sounds infinitely less exciting.

[doubleoohbaby]

Speak for yourself. I think a mission to retrieve alcohol through space and time sounds rather entertaining.

[badnewsboy]

Then I'm coming too!

[doubleoohbaby]

Can you carry plenty of bottles?

[badnewsboy]

I've more strength in me than I look.

[doubleoohbaby]

I'm sure you do. Although I've yet to find out what that look is.