05: † text

[salvagedsoul]

Hello, everyone.

I have been in United Earth territory since June. I was released last week. Although I have been inspected and declared safe by the Initiative, I feel that it is my obligation to notify you all of what happened.

I am very eager to see some of you again. I am staying in my assigned housing at 502 while I continue to recover. Please come by at your convenience.


((feel free to use this post for both network conversations and action!))

Comments

[redheadcarrier]

No. But you're still just like everyone else.

[She sounds horrifically bitter.]

[salvagedsoul]

[he looks over his shoulder and back at her, exhaustion in his eyes.]

So I am unlike everyone else, but just like everyone else. I wonder just what it is that makes me different anymore.

[Kaworu is really talking about something completely different than she is. Asuka's accusations are a springboard for getting lost in the sea of issues drowning him inside his head now. But even so, he wants her here, with him... Being the subject of her rage provides a comfort he couldn't describe to a Lilim.]

Are you going to leave me now?

[Kaworu waits in the doorway for her to follow.]

[redheadcarrier]

You'd deserve it.

[She wants him to get angry. She wants him to lash out. She wants to see that she's hurting him. But he doesn't respond to her barbs or her insults or the way her sneer carries over into her voice.

This silent, calm acceptance of her anger isn't fair.]

Why shouldn't I?

[She's stalling.]

[salvagedsoul]

[Because you don't want to. Because you missed me. Because you were worried about me. Because you still are worried and you want to know what happened. Because leaving wouldn't be the way to treat someone you love, either.

There is a dozen very true responses he could give to that question. No matter which he chooses, his guilt will remain. The best way for him to take care of his sense of failure towards her is to make it about her.

He looks down at the ground and sighs.]

Because, I want you to stay. Please, don't leave.

[redheadcarrier]

[Asuka looks away, hands curling into fists.]

Why? Why? You left me without even saying goodbye! I didn't even realize you were gone!

[salvagedsoul]

[They're starting to go in circles. What is it that she's subconsciously asking him to say? He's not sure. Maybe she's gone back to trying to get a reaction out of him.]

I've already agreed that it was a mistake. I wouldn't expect you not to be angry about it.

[This may be something he isn't going to be able to address with Asuka now. It's only their first meeting since he got back. As much as he wants her to sit with him, and let him hold her hand, and distract him from his problems with her own, it might not be possible.]

You can leave if you want.

[redheadcarrier]

I think I will!

[She's still angry and hurt, so she simply turns to storm out. She pauses in the entryway to get in another parting shot.]

Maybe you can enjoy being by yourself!

[She slams the door on her way out.]