Elizabeth Tudor [ ᴏғ ᴇɴɢʟᴀɴᴅ ɪʀᴇʟᴀɴᴅ & ғʀᴀɴᴄᴇ ] (
onemistress) wrote in
exsilium2013-08-05 12:42 pm
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[ 001 ⚜ ] | video;
[ the tablet is sat in Elizabeth's lap, she hasn't worked out really how it works beyond hitting buttons until something seemed to happen. Which she's frowning so at it then far too pleased with herself when it seems to do what she wants it to. ]
How on earth do they make the little images move -- ? [ but it is no real, matter. She's learning to just accept the fact she doesn't understand how half this stuff works ] I've a few questions that I cannot ascertain simply from watching if I may be so bold... [ she licks her lips briefly before continuing. ] ... where does one find material to make clothes from? As I've yet to make sense of the items I find here made already, but the clothes I arrived in are... not fitting for most daily activities. [ It had only one layer of clothing and... no. No that seems wrong and strange and not at all decent. ]
As well as... [ she lent her head on her hand as she hummed. Making requests is strange, there ought to be people swarming about her, accompanying her wherever she went but now there isn't and its so odd to ask. ] Would I be able to request someone to take a walk about the city with me? Someone who is familiar with the times, so to speak, as I find myself unable to make sense of very much of it. England was a very different place to me, and I cannot make heads nor tails of her now. I do not ever recall her raining so much. [ and she smiles very briefly. ]
My thanks for your time.
[ ooc: my mistake, this should read as coming from Victoria Guildford. forgot to add it in, all my apologies for the confusion. ]
How on earth do they make the little images move -- ? [ but it is no real, matter. She's learning to just accept the fact she doesn't understand how half this stuff works ] I've a few questions that I cannot ascertain simply from watching if I may be so bold... [ she licks her lips briefly before continuing. ] ... where does one find material to make clothes from? As I've yet to make sense of the items I find here made already, but the clothes I arrived in are... not fitting for most daily activities. [ It had only one layer of clothing and... no. No that seems wrong and strange and not at all decent. ]
As well as... [ she lent her head on her hand as she hummed. Making requests is strange, there ought to be people swarming about her, accompanying her wherever she went but now there isn't and its so odd to ask. ] Would I be able to request someone to take a walk about the city with me? Someone who is familiar with the times, so to speak, as I find myself unable to make sense of very much of it. England was a very different place to me, and I cannot make heads nor tails of her now. I do not ever recall her raining so much. [ and she smiles very briefly. ]
My thanks for your time.
[ ooc: my mistake, this should read as coming from Victoria Guildford. forgot to add it in, all my apologies for the confusion. ]
no subject
[The guilt.]
...English royalty, huh?
1/3
2/3 to private;
Her fingers clenched up in her dress, and it was a fight, fight to keep her breath even and her face calm. But she already knew that was enough. The whole world could see it, as far as people were watching these conversations.
She's not having that. Thank god she'd watched Raven do this, even if it takes her a good minute fumbling about on the device, frantically hitting buttons until she's sure no one can see this. Most people here are too unschooled to even know what these things are. She's worked hard to keep this lie smooth, to be all of one thing, less than what she is. For her own safety.
But this one? This one was too clever by half. There's a real fear in her. It wasn't the first time her royal blood had been the instrument in her near death. The year in the tower knowing that coldness would make anyone terrified. ]
3/3 private video;
Never say again I am related to the royal family of this land. I am a servant to their Majesties, nothing more.
[ But she knows it'll serve her nothing now, her voice is too strained and the panic is too obvious. She cursed to herself in every language she knew, how could she be such an idiot. It might be damning because she's commanding, in the end. No lady in waiting commands like that, they request. But she'd ruled just long enough to know how to speak when like she expected the world to heel at her command. That just made her curse more, feeling frustrated.
She changed her tone after a moment, trying to calm down from the mindless sort of panic that gripped her. ]
I beseech you, to never do so.
private video;
[And no, so doesn't buy the attempt to lie. You're pretty obvious Elizabeth]
Or you'll what? Have me killed? I don't think that'd really work.
[Being already dead and all. But he'll relent at least, because honestly having an angry royal after him again seems like way too much of a hassle]
Don't worry- I won't tell anyone. I'm not exactly being truthful about who I am, so it's not like it's my place to judge another.
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But the rest of it, the calm admission in reply, so earnestly said with so little care. Her mouth opened and closed as she grappled with a reply. ]
You... you're not going to try and blackmail me? Threaten me? Not that it would serve you well, I have no more than any other here.
[ Royal she might be, but her power was not a consolidated one, they tricked her into things she didn't want to do, forced her hand where they thought she should act. No one was king to a Queen unless they wanted something.
Because information like that could get her killed, she was sure, in the end. In this place, she couldn't think of anything more idiotic than admitting you were the Queen of England. ]
private video; 1/2
No, I'm not. I'm pretty sure threatening or blackmailing you would end in way more trouble for me than it's worth.
private video;
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But then he came out with that and she just. Stopped. Again. Stop that Zelos, she can't deal with it. Not when she was in the middle of fighting childhood fears and the resentment at what she'd done that made walking about this place a hell. ]
My being a lady is little to concern to those who want power, believe me. Rather they'd use my weaker sex against me more often than not. [ she looks away for a moment, finally calming down and collecting herself. She still didn't know what to think about this. ] Saying you are related to the royal family can get one killed, in my experience. It has much to do with this place and its disdain for royalty, as it is the knowledge of how such things are treated where I come from, that it made more sense to hide myself away.
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Right, I can get that. Not announcing you're a royal seems like the wise choice in a situation like this. I can respect that.
[But he could tell that it was unlikely she's going to trust him on good faith alone. Why should she anyway? If it's one thing that nobles can't afford to have, is complete faith in people- especially strangers]
But I'm serious, I'm not going to use it against you. I mean I guess I could swear until I'm blue in the face, but really? It'd probably be easier to say that I really don't have anything to gain from it- so why would I?
I mean, if I wanted that kind of power? It'd be way easier to say who I am in my world than sell out a royal.
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It's on the tip of her tongue, because she wants to say so much, about who she is, what this means. But she figures if he he can hear her guilt to know who she is enough, the rest would be blanks she thinks he can make.
In the end she agrees with everything he says, he spells it out clearly and she supposed she could give him enough to understand her fear, even if its not directly stated, enough room to wiggle if she were ever pressed over the matter later. Walls have ears and the fear of being watched is a constant one. ] This is my homeland, though I am sure you are powerful enough for the both of us, and wretched as it might be, my blood is that of the Kings of this land. What I am so few can claim to ever be truly, especially here.
[ It wasn't all of it, but it was enough. What he'd already put together, though she'd give no more than that. For a clever man, that is enough, she knew. For a man able to raise an army, when a country was this distressed already, it was easy to move in. To take over.
And she was so sick of being a puppet in men's games. ] Though I am but a woman, I would fight to defend my right, and die for it, than give into such a fate. But dying is useless, and will not help me win this war. I think it is better for everyone, not just myself, if I keep such things secret. The English Kings have already failed this land, and I would not compound my sins by causing further suffering.
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[Though...it's hard not to note the guilt]
However, homeland or not- I doubt you had anything to do with the current predicament it's in now.
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Oddly, she found herself wishing for Walsingham. His word was the only one that spoke truth plainly to her. ]
My mind I would no doubt to agree with you, were my heart not trapped in a nightmare of this city and the land I once so loved in ashes. I wake every morning and wonder how it could of come to this. It is a hell to me, and I fear the God punishes me by letting me see such things, to know that full effect of my decisions.
[ her eyes are down cast and it's both a relief and further heart break to ever speak of this to another.
Which begs another question, what on earth was she to do with him knowing all this? She pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache building in her temple.
So she spoke bluntly instead, some how she thought her present company would find that acceptable. She had no pretence now, and keeping up a charade was clearly useless. ] Well sir, I do not even know your name and you know enough to cleave my head from my shoulders, as it were. So I have absolutely no idea where that leaves us, but it clearly somewhere particular. What on earth would you do in my position?
[ Which if he'd preferred she never bother him again, well, he could say that. Rash action had already gotten her into this mess, she would do better to stop, and think about this further. Try and work out what kind of man he was, to whatever extent he'd let her learn of him. Gauge, measure, reassess. ]
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A world like this can not be a single fault of one, even if it feels that way. I don't know you, so maybe you did cause some harm- but I have my doubts. This land didn't fall at the hands of people who loved it.
[As for the second part...he shakes his head. Actual advice about what she should do with him]
I think...you should do what your heart tells you to do. I could advise you what I'd want to see, but would that be sincere or a way to placate me? I'm not going to keep reassuring you I won't spill your secrets. And so, I think at this point it's up to you to decide to take me for my word with compassion like your religion, or do as a noble would normally do.
But either way? It's up to you to decide.
private video; 1 / 2
[ There's that same long time before she speaks, because this -- this is not a moment for rash action and she can't stumble so blindly anymore. But her heart? Her heart could be a fool, it tended to love wrongly, just as her father and mother had.
But she'd learned to be more temperate than both of them. she had to, else she wouldn't last long. Here or home, it mattered little. ]
I think... [ Her father would rage, as she had, and he would be unrelenting until he deemed himself safe again. She had no idea what her mother would do, only weather such things bravely as far as the stories had been since she was a child.
What had Walsingham said? I say a prince should rather be slow to take action and should watch that he does not come to be afraid of his own shadow. she hadn't listened, but the rest of her advisers that would council her to go for the throat weren't here. Having a fear of him would be yet another thing to worry her. ]
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... I think I should rather like to be your friend first, if that is not at all objectionable to you, sir, and let your own actions speak of your valor.
private video;
[he knows that well. He's definitely not better off for having a large amount of time to think]
[But oh. Those words in that context. Your friend. There was nothing friendly to be had here, he was being tested. Tested and watched, maybe see if he could be controlled or kept quiet somehow. ]
[There is a slight frown on his face before he goes back to a neutral expression, but that's all. He's not really all that surprised. Nobles simply don't make friends.]
I wouldn't find acquaintanceship to be objectionable.
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[ Silly chit that she is, she honestly believe that. ]
I would invite you to dine with me, as is proper for an acquaintanceship only I cannot cook as it stands so you will have to forgive me. [ It's a poor joke, but she's trying to turn it away from such harsh topics. ]
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[But he can tell it's an attempt to turn it away from the dark topic, and so he'll go with it]
Heh, that's alright. We could always find a restaurant if you want to dine together, my lady.
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[ She laughs after a moment. Suddenly it's utterly hilarious to her, after all this is said and done. ] It occurs to me I still do not even know your name.
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Oh- hahah, that's right! I'm Kaneis, Kaneis Major. And what of you, my dear?
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I'd prefer if you called me Victoria Guildford, as it says here.