[video]

[thats_brutal]

[The video cuts on to show a large man with long black hair leaning FAR too close to the camera, squinting as he tries to figure out the strange device. He can deal with his Deth-iPhone but this? This shit is fucking confusing]

Is this thing on? I don’t think this is on. What. How is this even supposed to… I don’t think this is working. [There are a few beeps as he hits a few buttons] Hellooooo? Is this even on? I don’t know how this fucking thing works. This is… [mutters] Stupid fucking tablet

[He sighs heavily, the breath seems to go on forever before he hits another button]

What does that blinking light mean? Is it… oh. It’s on.

[He clears his throat. He’s got some Very Important things to say after all]

Hi this is Nathan. [pause] Nathan Explosion. [pause] From Dethklok. [He pauses, waiting for people to react the way they normally do. You know. Scream. Cry. Kill themselves. Chicks ripping off their clothes and throwing themselves at him. The usual.

When that doesn't happen he squints at it again]

No really is this thing even fucking on?

Comments

[thats_brutal]

[He pauses. Seriously what the fuck is wrong with this guy... waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait]

You're not from Earth are you. [Nope that wasn't a question.]

[wolfuncaged]

No, I am from a land called Thedas. Was that not obvious?

[Sure hope you enjoy being talked to like you're an idiot, Nathan]

[thats_brutal]

[He rolls his eyes]

Yeah you said that. But is Thedas, like, another country in Europe or something? They've got a shit ton of those little countries that no one really cares about.

[wolfuncaged]

Thedas is the name of the main continent in my world. It is not part of any....'Europe'.

[thats_brutal]

[He stares at the other man for a long moment.






A loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong moment.






No really, is he ever planning on saying anything?







Oh, wait, there it is:]

What the fuck's wrong with your neck?

(this is not here)

[ninjamanager]

[wolfuncaged]

[Fenris pauses, rubbing a hand over the aforementioned body part, confused]

I...what do you mean?

[thats_brutal]

[He rolls his eyes and speaks more slowly, raising his voice. Yes because THAT is the problem here]

What. The fuck. Is wrong. With your neck?

[wolfuncaged]

I do not know what you are referring to. My markings?

[thats_brutal]

Is that what those are? Markings? They look like, I don't know, like some bug or something.

[wolfuncaged]

They are made of magical substance which was branded into my flesh.

[thats_brutal]

Wait you were branded? Like... a slave or a cow or something?

[wolfuncaged]

Exactly that. I was a slave.

[thats_brutal]

Whoa. That's brutal.

[wolfuncaged]

Did you expect it to be easy?

[thats_brutal]

Being a slave is easy, isn't it? You don't have to think about anything. You just, you know, do whatever someone else tells you and they give you food and clothes and shit.

[Nathan. Nathan no. Nathan STAHP]

[wolfuncaged]

[Nathan no]

Yes. The clothes they decide you are to wear, and food when they decide you are to be allowed to eat. You are a fool if you honestly believe being a slave is easy. It is the sort of ignorance I would expect of someone who has had freedom their entire lives.

[thats_brutal]

I don't know. The Klokateers always seemed pretty okay with it. We tell them what to wear and what to eat and all that shit. [a beat] of course we pay them... I think... do we? Maybe...

[ninjamanager]

[you are so lucky he decided to RSS-feed you, Nathan. so damn lucky. he glances down in the middle of going through Initiative assignment records in time to see ...... this train wreck]

We do. And slaves aren't paid, Nathan.

[Fenris]

I know he's ignorant, but please, try not to kill him. It's my job to make sure he doesn't, uh, die.

[wolfuncaged]

No. Slaves are not paid.

[Charles]

Then it must be a very difficult job for you. He seems to care little for his own self preservation.