1st keystroke [video]

[acts_of_claudia]

[The video cuts in on a redheaded girl with one shock of green hair grinning at the camera]

So is it just me or does that [air quotes] "orientation" thing need a little spicing up? Seriously. I didn't know whether I was going to the grand inquisitor's office or if I was back in the... uh... [She cringes, realizing what she almost just said. Grinning suddenly she waves it off] in bed having some weird-ass dream or something.

I do feel kinda gypped, though. [She mocks the woman's voice] "your housing companions will assist you in becoming ready." Yeah well I don't have any "housing companions" so I guess I'm on my own. [beat] Again.

[Yeah this is so familiar. Left alone in an unfamiliar place. Groovy. Yeah. She's done it before and she can do it again. She shrugs, shooting the camera a lopsided grin]

So I guess what I'm really saying is: Is there any place a girl can get a burger around here? I'm starving.

Comments

[acts_of_claudia]

Shut the front door.

[Her face lights up. Wow she never thought she'd be this happy to see those eyebrows.]

[curatesecrets]

[okay, okay, fine, he's laughing. you got him.]. Hey, kiddo. Where are you?

[acts_of_claudia]

[You'd better laugh, man. That grin isn't going anywhere]

Right now? I'm at my place. Unit 1008.

[curatesecrets]

Oh. [his brow crumples in an envy that looks much more like a puppy in pain]

You're on the first floor...?

[acts_of_claudia]

[Wow that's an interesting reaction. Of course, given his lack of exercise it's unsurprising]

Nuh-uh. You missed a digit, there. Ten-oh-eight. Tenth floor.

[curatesecrets]

... That makes me feel a little better. [it just means he has to climb three floors instead of go down six. oh well.]

I'll be there soon.

[acts_of_claudia]

I'm glued to my seat. [she smirks, spinning in her chair.]

[curatesecrets]

You, actually staying put? You know, if there were anyone from Guinness here I'd tell them to get a stopwatch.

[he's on the move, now, but stopping at the door.

mostly because he has to put his shoes back on]

[acts_of_claudia]

Tick tock, Artie. This is a limited time offer.

[But she's smirking. What? Strange new unknown place. Why wouldn't she want to see him?]

[curatesecrets]

Yes, but you see - nngh. [grabbing the doorframe so he doesn't fall over while he's putting his shoes back on WHY IS HIS ROOMMATE JAPANESE] There was sort of an implied bit of humor there as to you -- [aha. SHOES OBTAINED.]

Nevermind. I'm coming up.

[acts_of_claudia]

Mmmmm-hmm. C'mon, old man, get jogging. Oh wait. That wasn't invented when you were a kid! Sorry, I forgot.

[The more you tease the worse she'll get. It's like one of those Chinese finger traps]

[curatesecrets]

[it's like the rope from the Mary Celeste or something. but that's okay. so is he]

You're still actually sitting there? Forget Guinness. We might have to see if this timeline still has a Vatican. We may have an actual miracle on our hands.

[acts_of_claudia]

[She's standing up on sheer principle.]

Geez could you be any slower? Keep talking and I'm going out the window just to spite you.

[curatesecrets]

Out the window, what are you gonna do, tie your bedsheets together? [hey look, stairs are evil, okay. they are very evil. at least there are only a few flights' worth]

[acts_of_claudia]

[Is that the sound of a window opening. I think it is.]

I'll have you know I can be incredibly innovative in my escapes.

[curatesecrets]

Innovative. Right. Like the time you escaped from that mess with Volta's lab coat completely on your -- did you seriously just open the window --

[yep. jogging up the last flight now. Claudia. do not be a moron]

[acts_of_claudia]

Okay, yeah, not one of my finest moments. Thanks, though, I've been meaning to rub salt in that wound for a while, now.

[Hear the wind whistling by the window, Artie?]

And you're supposed to be a smart guy, you tell me.

[curatesecrets]

[he doesn't even bother to snark back, he just pulls the door open and bursts in. out of breath, yes, but he made it there before she did a Stupid Claudia Thing, and he's fixing her one of his wild, "young lady I am going to throttle you" looks. probably because she just shaved another year off his life]

[acts_of_claudia]

[Claudia's quite comfy spinning around and around in her chair with her tablet on the open windowsill. When the door bursts open she plants her feet, bringing her spinning to a halt]

Dude, haven't you ever heard of the grand invention called knocking? Really. All the cool kids are doing it.

/really needs a better Them icon

[curatesecrets]

[there's a lot of flustered wordless stammering going on for a moment, gibberish mostly, with a few variations on "what", "you", "this", and "just". he strangles the air in front of him ineffectually, raises his hands as though he's about to bury them in his hair, then closes them into fists, closes his eyes, and breathes out sharply, lowering his hands to his sides]

[when he opens his eyes again, he's smirking.]

Knock knock, Claudia.

[acts_of_claudia]

[She cracks up, doing another 360 in the chair before propelling herself to her feet and forward towards Artie.]

Careful, there, gramps, you looked like you were about to have a stroke or something.

Also: Stealing my lines? Come on, at least come up with something original. [But she's grinning as she teases. Hello Artie she really is glad you're here what]

[curatesecrets]

Please. You'll have to do more than open a window to get rid of me.

[raising one eyebrow, he adjusts his coat. please don't hug him. please don't hug him. please don't hug him.]

[acts_of_claudia]

Yeah. You're like the one fly that gets into the room and won't leave no matter how many windows or doors you open.

[She grins. She wasn't going to hug you but, well, you look so damn uncomfortable that she can't help but make it worse! Have a hug, Artimus]

[curatesecrets]

Oh, so I'm a fly now? [that particular line of grumping gets cut short as she hugs him, however, and he makes a few stammered noises of protest before giving in and patting her awkwardly on the back. thump thump.]

[acts_of_claudia]

[She laughs, letting go of him with a smirk]

Would you rather be Jeff Goldblum?

[i.e. cheer up, old man.]