[1] - [Voice]

[handsomejack]

[An automated female voice plays. Jack doesn't feel the need to do his own advertisement. After weeks of building his supplies, he sends this out to every communicator.]

Need repairs?

Want some support during your missions?

Maybe you just want a robo buddy to train with. Maybe you want a tune up.

LOOK NO FURTHER!

Jack's Armory™ is here to serve you-- Our glorious participants of the Initiative.

Shields, support robots, and even requests- if it's interesting enough. If it can be thought up, it can be made. Upgrades available to more frequent customers.

Available now: Basic shields. Sonic wave blast if shields are breached with a twenty second recovery time. We will pause now for your reaction of awe and amazement.

[There's a pause]

Pause completed.

Trades are acceptable in exchange- with reason. Money and supplies are preferred.

Comments

video; WELL HELLO THERE FELLOW OPPORTUNIST

[totallytrustworthy]

[Oh look, a business competitor. Lovely. You know, Chloe certainly can't expect to be the only person out to steal a few marques from the other transports on the island, but she certainly was enjoying it for however long it lasted.

Which is, you know, right about now.]

Cute advertisement. Must've cost you a fortune.

Private-> video; HI THERE

[handsomejack]

[Well hi, gorgeous.]

Oh yeah. An arm and a leg.

Did you need somethin', sweetheart?

[totallytrustworthy]

Possibly. [And there's a proper smile because you've been kind enough to show your face. That's a relief. Nothing more painful than an anonymous seller, after all.]

Jack, right? You're new around here.

[handsomejack]

That's right. 'Been here for a few weeks now. Would've made a grander entrance, but I was more interested in evaluating out little situation here and pawing through the archives than I was giving the classic what the hell response.

And you are...?

[totallytrustworthy]

Decent enough strategy. Can't really fault you for that. And it looks like you've found just what you were after, if you've already managed as decent a stockpile as you claim.

Chloe Frazer, love. Treasure hunter by trade.

[handsomejack]

It's a pleasure, Chloe.

Treasure hunter? Dangerous work there for such a gorgeous woman. You've done much since arriving to this place? Swag's hard to come by, but I noticed if you look at the right places it's not so bad.

[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Robots, huh?

[Hi Jack. Meet your competition.]

Alright, so you sorta got me beat there. Never managed to build one of those.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

[Hi, Man-who-isn't-a-threat-to-his-greatness]

Yeah. Being an expert and everything, I can make one in my sleep.

Jack. You got a name, champ?

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Eddie Riggs, I'm a roadie.

[He thinks that now.]

Yeah? So where have you been finding components?

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

Wouldn't you like to know, Eddie boy. If you're a good scavenger, you know the places to look.

You build a lot of stuff?

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

It's what I do for a living, dude. I build stages and shit so bands can rock the fuck out. I can fix instruments, cars, make the best fucking sandwich you've ever tasted.

Slap some junk in front of me, and I can make some good shit from it.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

You don't say.

Don't have a lot of need for stages here... I'm sure someone might use an instrument as a weapon. Like that El-kabong guy. And everyone can use a kick ass sandwich.

Yeah, okay. You're useful.

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Hey, just wait and see. There's a reason I was in charge of organizing an army before this.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

[He laughs]

No way. Seriously?

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Yeah, helped shut down a bunch of freaky ass BDSM wearing demons from controlling humanity. Did it with the power of Metal and melting a lot of faces.

It was pretty fucking awesome.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

Sounds like a stoned metal-head's wet dream.

[Voice]

[biwinning]

Name the kind of suppliesth you're looking for.

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Well, their leader just couldn't keep his dick out of anything that walked. Shame it never got him ahead in life.

Heh. Ahead. Get it?

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

[A laugh]

Well that's too damn bad for him. What's the point of getting that much ass if you're not getting ahead?

You find some work around here, Eddie, or you're just getting by and doing that training business?

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

I got plenty of work. Plannin' on opening up a shop. I figure folks can trade money or supplies, or something even rarer if they want a big job.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

Huh. Make something nice enough and I might consider a trade.

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Hey, keep an eye out. I'll have my own shit set up on here soon enough. Same goes for you, Jack.

Private->[Audio]

[handsomejack]

Anything you're lookin' for, kiddo?

Private->[Voice]

[handsomejack]

Scrap, wires, chord, salvaged technology like microwaves, television sets, metal... Basically if it resembles something that could've been a part of technology at one point, I want it.

Private->[Audio]

[asskickersunite]

Once I have the parts, I can build the rest. It'd sure be nice to have some flamethrowers and machine guns on my car again, but I don't know how well I could drive her right now, given the terrain.