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[theguideless]

[LONG TIME NO POST. but hey, shiny new...typey-posty-devices. he must try. he must...fail to really get how this shit works.

the feed is sideways. a blink, a beat with an expression realizing oh hey it's doing a thing, and then a moment to quickly right the thing. this way. whew. okay.]

Ha, uh...Sorry. [sheepish.] I wasn't very good with the old one...and this one's stranger. [let him demonstrate by trying to fold one corner of it into view...but not really getting that far and just kind of. shaking the feed. oh well.]

Maybe it just takes getting used to... [by golly it only took months to feel comfortable with the old one what could go wrong with this.] I'll try not to do anything too strange or...press anything I don't recognize. [which is a lot.] I just wanted to make sure I could at least...hear from people again.

[a beat.

wait...]

I'm...being heard right now, right?

Comments

[strategic_guile]

[Martin... Martin, that name sounds familiar; but while he's thinking he gives a softer smile] Well, Martin. Have you apologized for what you did?

[theguideless]

I've...[a breath.] I've been...trying. Looking for them. The ones I have to...

[strategic_guile]

[Politest face you have ever seen.] What happened?

[theguideless]

[slowly moving to hug his arms.]

I got very sick. I hurt a lot of people because of it.

[strategic_guile]

[Now the name dings in his head; unless there's another Martin here] So you have some kind of power?

[theguideless]

Ah – [he seems to shake off something, blinking.] Well, I... I did. It's different now. I'm not the same anymore.

[strategic_guile]

Not the same? Does this place change people's powers? [Sees that shaking off and lifts an eyebrow]

[theguideless]

No.

[a beat. he's...not sure what the right tone to take is. ultimately, he just shrugs.] Dying can, though.

[strategic_guile]

Ahh... so you're Martin Darkov.

[theguideless]

[a small nod.]

Just not...Darkov anymore. That's what's gone.

[strategic_guile]

So the Darkov was a title?

[theguideless]

Mm. It was...a lot. [he scratches under his jaw, looking down again.] It was everything I thought I was, everything I was taught to be. Everything my family believed in...[looking back up.] They still do.

But it's something I'm not. Not anymore. And I never should've been.

[strategic_guile]

A way of life, then? [Purses his lips slightly] And dying... took part of that power away?

[theguideless]

The whole body. [he presses his hand on his chest.] This one's different.

[strategic_guile]

So when you come back to life they... recreate your body? [He does not look pleased at that idea.]

[theguideless]

Oh, that... [ehm.] No, those people had nothing to do with this, I'm afraid. This isn't something...something that can happen to other people.

[strategic_guile]

Hmm... [He's quiet for a good bit, taking that in.] I guess I just wonder if you die and they bring you back, will you die again when you get back home and all contact with this place is gone.

[theguideless]

[he grimaces.]

Well, ah, that...[he tries to pull a smile; it doesn't last.] I'm afraid it's not easy to explain. I'm sorry. I just...I won't ever be that. Again. It's done.

[strategic_guile]

[Shakes his head and lifts a hand] Nah, that's alright. You've got a special circumstance. I was wondering more for the non-powered people.

[theguideless]

[with the uncomfortable note in his voice remaining:] I...I don't really know or...understand anything about that. I never knew they could, or... [looking away. softer:] Or why some just...stay gone, then...

[strategic_guile]

One day we'll just have to get the answer out of them.

[theguideless]

[he makes a soft sound, neither agreeing nor disagreeing. it's just not something he knows how to feel about.

one day, huh...]

[strategic_guile]

[An apologetic smile] Sorry for all the questions, but you were the only one I knew of to ask. I hope you reach those people you need to, Martin.

[theguideless]

Oh– [oop, the reflex. other people can apologize, it's ok man...

he exchanges the look.] Thank you. Blaine.