exsilium | Entry I

Entry tags:

Entry I | Video

[The screen is black for a long moment, though the speakers seem to be working, passing along the soothing and lovely sound of someone banging their finger against a spot too near the microphone. Finally, though, the camera blooms to life, and give those watching a great look at the massive brown eye being shoved right up against the camera. A young woman’s voice is again too close to the mic]

Honestly, whoever enchanted this thing is a master artist. I can’t even detect a hint of magic around it, and yet it seems to be working just fine. I’m not sure why they made it look like a flat brick and not a proper crystal ball or mirror is beyond me.

[She sighs, pulling back slightly to reveal a young woman with slightly pointed ears and exotic features who looks anywhere between 15 and 23]

Oh wait, right, that would require someone to become a powerful archmage without going so utterly mad that they start running around creating whatever pops into their heads. [She holds it back further and shakes her head.] At least it isn’t an owlbear.

So, am I to take it there are those out there who can hear me?

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That, or this is just a really charming echo.

Let me guess, another mage? Don't worry. Apparently there's a lot of you here. Enough that there's a cub scout troop for it.

[those slight points don't escape him! Half-elves are pretty rare where he's from. Hmm.] Plenty of us. And it's no enchantment--it's a machine.

[Bemused] Nonsense, that's not nearly suave enough an echo to be mine.

Oh dear, I've gone and given myself away. I'm not certain what a cub scout troop is, but it must not be many because it seems your buildings are mostly standing. That's rare when you have a lot of mages in one place.

Mages just up and create owlbears where you're from?

[ That is way too exciting to think about! ]

[You sir, have perhaps the most impressive ears she has ever seen.] And here I thought I'd finally found some peace and quiet. [She holds back the device suddenly, as if afraid it will explode.] A machine? It...it doesn't run on turnips does it?

But it is witty and endearing enough to be mine. Marco, at your service or something. I'm getting pretty good at the guidebook thing already.

I think these guys are more preoccupied with eating pie, from the sounds of it. But don't let that go on record. The one's still miffed about the Cheetohs thing I think.

Really, you'd be astonished the sort of insane things a bored mage can come up with if you give him too much free time. I think it's a side effect of higher tier magic.

[She pauses, then makes a face] Though I suppose a mage making it is better than the alternative. That poor owl.

[ Oh dear, Collette ends up laughing at the idea -- which is both horrifying and gross (and maybe a little funny) all at once. ]

No way, didn't need to go there, no thanks for that mental picture! Though there might be worlds where things like that are natural. I've met this one girl, she has polar bear dogs where she's from! No mention of magic or mages involved at all!

No plain polar bears, either.

I'm going to have to check and make sure those words mean the same thing here as where I came from. Well met Marco, I am Reya, and we may be in luck, I happen to get along with guidebooks a great deal easier than people.

Eating pie is a far wiser investment of ones time than what most mages get up to. [And you have lost her] I speak at least three languages, but that wasn't any of them. Cheetohs?

Ah, but my old teachers said I had a gift for vivid pictures, right before they'd beg my guardian to let them gag me. Polar bear dogs? Well now, at least they're both mammals, but you say magic wasn't involved? I'd argue breeding doesn't work that way, but, well, [Lifts her hand to flick her ear] I'm living proof it does.

They have polar bear dogs, but no polar bears? Did the bears find the dogs so attractive they stopped breeding with each other?

Ah, the ears are real! So what does that make you?

[ She snorts, covering her mouth with one hand to pretend she's not smiling at the absurd idea. ]

Maybe the dogs were better friends than the male bears, so they all died off over time while the lady bears hung out with their new crowd. Who knows! We should ask Korra.

I certainly hope so, I doubt I could get my gold back for them now! That would make me half elf, and half human, and all around trouble. [Not going to mention the part where she's half god. That just makes trouble]

We should, I'm finding myself very intrigued by this. [Beats thinking about how she just got drafted while she was already in the middle of a war] It would make sense, certainly male dogs are more charming than most male humans, elves, or tieflings I've met.

[ Ah-hah! Collette claps her hands together, excited at this announcement. ]

Half elf, half human! That's amazing! Is that why you're so pretty?

[ She wonders about the genetics of it all, belatedly realizing what she... said. Well, if she were aiming for rude statements, she's getting off to a great start! She waves a hand at the camera. ]

Not that it needs to be! We don't have actual elves where I'm from. We've just got elves in books and on television that are either pretty as you please, or short and squat and working for Santa Claus.

[ Just... stop... now. Laughing a little at the idea of male dogs as the most preferable companions... ]

I don't know, dogs are pretty sweet, but I don't know if I'd say they're charming. Devoted, totally. Drooly? They're champions of drool.

Like some guys I know, now that I think about it...

[ She looks off camera, contemplating this thought with exaggerated care. ]

[She grins back, clearly highly amused by this development. Though she has to hide a little flush at the pretty comment.]

Oh no, that's just due to years of clever planning.

[As rudeness goes, Colette is nowhere near some of the jerks she has to deal with daily, so she waves it off.]

No elves? But then who do you get to act snooty and high handed at you? [She loves elves, some of her best friends are elves, but they can be prats] I believe ours are the former sort. Is Santa Claus some sort of Archmage or warlord?

Well, you just have to learn to appreciate their own unique style of charm. Once you get in the right mindset, drool can be downright romantic.

[Compared to her admirers it certainly is.]

Sounds like we've been meeting men from the same pool.

[ Ah, she's glad her new friend (...) doesn't seem to take exception. Collette grins and laughs lightly at her comments. ]

Oh, we have the rich, the entitled, the famous -- you don't need another species just to have a bunch of people decide to look down on you.

[ Which either doesn't bother her, or bothers her in a way she chooses to hide. ]

Santa Claus? Hahaha, no way! He's not an archmage, if he does his job using magic, and he definitely isn't a warlord. He's a story we tell kids about, this big guy in a red suit who brings all the nice children toys one day of the year, and leaves all the naughty children coal.

[ Because that makes sense. ]

Romantic drool? I don't think I'm buying what you're selling. Unless someone's really into kissing you... no that is still just totally gross, I'm sorry.

[aw, that gets a laugh.] No; electricity.

It's not magic, but technology. Not even the Arch-Mage I knew could summon and keep people from others realms into an entirely different world.

And yes, I can hear you.

My goodness, that seems terribly efficient of you. Though I doubt the elves will want to give up their niche.

[She makes no secret her feelings for the entitles and pretentious]

What an odd tale to tell children. [She tilts her head slightly to the side.] We have gift giving festivals, but they are tied more to seasons than behavior.

[Though if they did they'd probably have stuff like the Krampus, and it'd be real. Friggin fantasy.]

Yes, that does sound rather gross. [She bets Anomen drooled.]

Mysteria's will, really? But I haven't seen a single steam engine or turnip around. I knew one or two who might have pulled it off, but they're busy being meddling gits or dead.

Well, that's a relief at least.

[She grins, she likes when people laugh. Also relief, because Turnip tech is not reliable in her experience] Thank Tymora. Electricity you say? What an odd idea.

I can hear and see you.

It’s not a magic mirror. [Although he made the same assumption.] It’s a husktop. It uses video, which is why I can see you.

Perhaps I should have cast an invisibility spell before I called, really thrown everyone off.

Curse it, that would have made sense. [Head tilt] Video? I feel everyone is speaking a different language.

Well, many things here are new so they probably had to make more words for it.

Can you really turn yourself invisible?

If they're going to make up words they should have the decency to provide us with a explanation before hand.

[She grins, then waves her hand and murmurs a few words of power, lights swirling around her, before suddenly she's gone in the blink of an eye, yet the camera remains in its same place]

That I can.

[Although he should have expected it, he was still shocked.]

How did you do that?

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Entry I | Video

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