[voice] backdated to arrival/ the 1st

[monocle]

[The beautiful sound of silence, an open feed clicking on with nothing to follow.

But then there is a low chuckle. The clearing of a throat.] My, my! Quite the predicament.

I can’t say I’m too thrilled with any aspect of this… arrangement, but it’s been intriguing so far. Explanations have been exceptionally succinct as well, I must admit. All that’s left is to take a moment to dwell on what I’ve learned, soak it all in. Quite a lot for an ordinary man to take in, you must already know.

[…]

Hm... There is one dear, troubling problem.

I just don’t room with anyone like some common vagrant. So these two other ‘Transports’ assigned to share unit 1409 best vacate the premises and find other lodgings for the time being. Certainly you understand, no?

It’s not negotiable, I’m afraid.

Comments

[phaseshifts]

[He sounds much more like his usual darkhearted self via the network. He takes pains to appear that way on the communicators now, what with Allen and Lenalee making his life more difficult.]

You could try making friends. [A joke. He pities whoever got stuffed in with Cyril.

Sort of.]

not actually here

[payback]

[S-S-SCREAM. Hearing that oily, polished voice takes her back and not in a good way. The idea that someone awful from the past could always appear quite easily was one Rin knew but a long relief from the actual experience of that put her at ease. Deception, of course. She listens to the recording twice and goes on without responding.

Boy her heart rate should not be spiking just at this but it is.]

[monocle]

What's that? You're inviting me to stay with you?

How kind!

[phaseshifts]

How did you construct an invitation from a single word in there?

[onemoredeath]

That isn't how this works.

[monocle]

I'm capable of seeing straight into the kindness of your heart.

Surely you wouldn't leave me out in the cold. Or the company of strangers.

[monocle]

Oh, but it is.

It just can't be any other way, I'm afraid.

[phaseshifts]

You're the sweet-talker, aren't you? Charm them.

[onemoredeath]

I'm afraid that you have little idea of what this place is like. It doesn't matter who you are or what you are use to before you came here. They gave you a room that is far better than any other place that you can find in this city. The only concession is that you live with someone else. If you do not like it, then you can seek one of the many abandoned buildings and restore it to whatever you desire.

[monocle]

I don't want to catch anything.

Which I'm aware is still an issue should I board with you, but at least I can assume the places you've been.

[phaseshifts]

Maybe I don't want to share a room with someone who's so mean to me.

[monocle]

Oh, but you see there will be an exception to this. I won't be boarding with anyone, I can assure you-- regardless of these supposedly enforced 'rules', however cute and well intentioned they are.

It is just not going to happen.

[monocle]

What are you talking about? I love you, dear brother!

The washed, sweet smelling and clean shaved you. I could live my life linked arm to arm with you in such a state and kiss you right on the mouth! My love knows no bounds, you know this!

[...] Unbathed the only exception.

[onemoredeath]

Who said they are rules? There is simply no room for people to hog space because of their supposed superiority. If gods have to share a room, so shall you.

[phaseshifts]

[Eugh okay Cyril stahp]

Maybe that's why I don't wash, did you ever think of that?

[monocle]

You're going to catch some wicked disease that way, Tyki!

Embrace my love, for it is unfaltering! For your own sake!

[phaseshifts]

Dirt is good for the skin, did you know?

THREADJACK!!!

[maddeninghatter]

[ He's been eavedropping (as per usual). ]

Oh dear.

[ From his tone of voice, you might think he's just been forced to eat a vegetable. ]

One of those, I see.

[monocle]

Supposingly ungoverned by rules then, why would I ever share space?

If Gods are so gullible to not claim what's rightfully theirs, that's their problem.

[monocle]

So is milk. I'd prefer you covered in one to the other.

[monocle]

Did you say something there? [As if he hadn't heard.]

[onemoredeath]

Maybe because you did not request that they give you a single room, or did you just assume that they would not do so? Having someone to share also cuts down on your cost and gives you access to a better cut of food, but if you wish to live that way, it is your choice.

As for gods, I do not question their thoughts since I much prefer my hands to remain hands.

[phaseshifts]

Well, I think you'd find it hard-pressed to justify using that much milk for non-drinking purposes around here...

[phaseshifts]

[omg he is so surprised by this he has nothing to even say, he just stares at his communicator in fascination. GONNA STALK U RITE BACK]

[monocle]

We'll have to compromise by smothering you in water, then.